"Alright, are you guys listening to me? We're cutting down on carbs starting June 1 'til we go away at the end of the summer."
It was just a normal night like any other when those words came out of my dad's mouth. My mom and I looked at each other very confused. We had to give up carbs? Well, this was just not going to do, now was it? After a little convincing by dad and when he threw out the words "weight loss" and "easy" in the same sentence, we figured, why not. It's only for 60 days, how hard can it be?
Well, it's June 10 as I'm writing this, a mere 10 days in, and it is hard. I have never been more bored with my food. And let me tell you, this is no way to live your young adult life. I wake up and eat eggs. I eat lunch, which tastes about the same as the food History textbooks describe the food Russian peasants being given back in the day. Then dinner rolls around and I'm still just as bored with food. The highlight of my day is eating my gummy vitamins because they taste like I'm eating actual food. Sometimes I even take twice what I'm supposed to.
The whole point of this is to cut down on our carb intake, not completely cut them out. If we had to cut them out I probably would have already dug my own grave (kidding, but not really). So I took "cut down on carbs" as a suggestion and let myself have a cheat meal once a day. So dedicated, I know. For example, tonight I'm going to get Pizookies with a couple friends and will not feel even the slightest bit guilty. If you have never been fortunate to taste one of these beautiful creations, there are over 1,000 calories, and of those thousand calories, almost half of them are carbs. Sorry dad.
I've never eaten so many salads in such a short period of time. During the school year when I would see girls at my sorority house eating a salad on the day we had mac n' cheese and cornbread, I was always confused. After this little diet of mine, I am even more confused.
After these next two months are over the plan is for me to have realized that I can live without carbs, but why would you ever want to do that? What is more realistically going to happen is that I will have been deprived from my one true love, carbs, and consume more than I did before.
Do people who don't eat carbs realize what pasta tastes like? Do you not want to enjoy the luxury of eating a bagel in bed at 11 a.m.? Do you think you're better than everyone because you don't eat pizza? Well unless you want to become Derek from "Stepbrothers," I encourage you to keep eating all the carbs your heart desires
