When I was younger, around the age of five. I seemed to have been a bit of a 'perfectionist' as my mom would call it. Everything had to be organized and everything had it's place. As I grew up, I was gradually hit with the reality that this perfection was impossible to keep up. Life is messy, and trying to clean it up all on your own, can be a burden far too heavy to bear. Beside being a part-time perfectionist, I have a genuinely sensitive, and big heart -coming from the least conceited context as possible, of course-. Taking things to heart so deeply and letting my emotions get the best of me has been an expertise of mine and I wish it wasn't. In the end, it really just always screwed me over, because very few other people feel the same. Elementary and junior high school were a breeze; high school was tough, emotions were destroyed, it would be swept under the rug, and I would try again. And then I went to college, the epitome of 'finding yourself', and I did just that.

If there is anything, among the mile-long list of lessons I learned my freshman year of college, it is to go with your gut, know that all good things have some bad that will follow, and to do what makes you the happiest, no matter what that may be. College started off to be the wildest, and most amazing time of my life. However, after the first couple weeks, I began to feel myself getting sucked into a downward spiral that seemed never-ending. I lacked in focusing on my priorities and became overly worried about others, and not about myself. I lost sight of what is the most important to me, and it messed up a lot of things in the long run. That most important thing, being me.

I came to college not wanting a boyfriend, and the first day, I found an amazing man. At first I was hesitant, not wanting that sort of responsibility in my life, especially now with all of the college madness surrounding me, but I knew, deep down, he was the best thing that could have happened to me. Since then, he has been my go-to person for just about anything, and I know he is always there for me. He is still among the few people I know that make me genuinely happy; someone like that is rare, and their presence in your life should not be taken for granted. People like that don't come into your life without reason, as the best things most likely happen when unexpected. I truly believe that he came into my life to help save me in a way. Without him, I cannot imagine how my first year of college might have gone, and who I would be today. If there is anything to take out of this, it is to do your best to be the best you you possibly can be, so that you can find that special person too, because it is truly an amazing thing. Of course the year still had it's ups and downs, but that is simply life. No relationship nor any life is complete perfection.

The thing is, so many people are fixed on this idea that everything has to be in place and they must have a plan that must be followed accordingly, but life, is not like that. Life is hard, really, really hard. And I hate to break it to you, but no matter how hard you try, your life cannot be perfect, and that is not your fault. It can feel like it is, or you can be satisfied with it, but never expect perfection. Life, comes with a whole lot of everything, so you better be prepared for whatever curveball it may throw at you. People are not perfect, and no life is perfect, but if you play it right, and find the right people, it can feel pretty close to perfect. Expect to be surprised, expect to mess up, and expect to feel sad, and know that it is ok. Without the bad days, how could we see and value the good ones as much as we do?

Please be gentle with yourself, and stay kind to everyone around you. Keep those important and special people in your life who will lift you up when you're down and support you endlessly. Please remember that perfection is not a goal, but being happy is. So be happy, do whatever it takes to feel that, and surround yourself with people or someone who makes you feel that way, and do not lose them. Because one day, you could wake up and not have them anymore. So please hold on tight to those who love you, and love them back harder. Live life happily, and live it imperfectly.