As many Grey's Anatomy fans know, when you find your person you should never let them go. However, what if who you thought was your person, really was not? Well, that is what happened to me. After finding my Christina Yang, I began to realize the one I considered to be my person was not who I was led on to believe she was.
No this is not me bashing her, I still consider her a friend but I would not call her to help me "hide a dead body" anymore. While she will always be a good friend of mine, and I will always be there to provide her with support and whatever else she needs, we will never be each other's "person".
Yang and Grey had moments where there friendship was tested and they always seemed to find their way back to one another, unfortunately, this is not the case in my life. As much as I hopped that I had found my person, it seemed to be all an illusion. Sadly, I felt like my friendship was slipping through the cracks and that my person and I were farther away from each other than prior to knowing each other, we were strangers. As sad as I was to finally realize this, there was not much I could do at that point.
Sad to see her go, I knew it was what I had to do. See, if I attempted to hold her back would I really be a good person? Although I no longer consider her to be my person, I am unsure of how she views the situation, if shes feeling/ thinking the same way I am. I know it may be hard for me to watch her become even more of a stranger to me, not talk every day about the most random things, and watch from a distance as she finds a new "person". Sometimes that is what we have to do. We have to escape relationships with people in order to grow as individuals. Weather the relationship was toxic or not, sometimes its the best thing we can do.
I will miss my person. There is no doubt in my mind that I will have to stop myself from calling her and texting her when I get hit on, or when something good happen. But, I am fine with letting my person go. I am fine with knowing she is just a friend of mine. You may be thinking why at this point. I pretty much told you how close we were and every reason why I would not want to loose her, but there is a reason I am okay with it. The reason is the simple fact that : her person is out there, and so is mine. We are not meant to be one another's person, and attempting to be that for each other takes away someone else's ability to become that individual.
So to my person- I hope you fill that spot in your life, I hope you realize I will miss you. I hope you see this is not easy for me. I hope you know I will always be there for you, if needed. I also hope you realize why it has to be like this. While I wish you were my person, I hope to always have you as a friend. I guess I should also thank you now, for helping me see what I do need in a person and for showing me how to be a better "person" for someone else.
Love,
Your Once Person
