Dear Cancer,

Let me just cut straight to the point because that’s what you seem to do far too often. Why? Why do you have to do what you do? Why do you have to take lives? Why do you have to walk right in and leave a path of destruction behind you? What did we ever do to you?

You walk around like you own the place. You strike fear into the hearts of many. You’re nothing more than a giant bully and I can’t stand you.

You operate on your own timeline. You take away the security that comes with predictability because you are so volatile and unpredictable. We’ve all got lives, Cancer. We’ve made plans, we’ve set goals, and you just waltz right in and take those things from us. Why?

You test limits. You bring people to their breaking points. Sometimes, you bring people past their breaking points. Why do you do what you do?

I can’t figure you out, and trust me; I’ve spent many nights trying. I get angry when I think of all the people in my life you’ve hurt. It extends far beyond the people whose body you decide to make your home. You hurt friends, family, sisters, brothers, mothers, fathers, I could sit here for hours and list person after person, but you know this. You know what you do.

Sometimes you work fast. Sometimes you like to draw the process out. Sometimes you go away just long enough to make people feel safe again. Sometimes you come back just to remind us that you’re really the one in control.

I’m not here to thank you for making us stronger. I can’t pretend to be that big of a person right now. Maybe someday I’ll be able to look back at you and say something like that, but today is not that day. All I see when I look at you is heartbreaking destruction.

I want to see the strength and the hope. Without those two things you win. I refuse to let you win. You can throw a wrench in whatever you want to. You will not win the war. You might be winning some of the battles, but don’t get comfortable. Hope is rising. Work is being done. You may be big and scary, but we can be bigger and scarier sometimes. Are you ready for the fight? We work hard to make sure that the bodies you inhabit are ready for the fight. The spirits of these people amaze and inspire me, and they should terrify you.

Don’t think you’re a hero. You’re far from that. You’re a villain. People are heroes because they don’t let you control them even though you try so hard to. You don’t always get to win. Even when you do win, you don’t because it’s not possible for you to win. Families and friends will not let that happen. Even when a person loses their fight with you, their memory lights a fire in those very people that you thought you had broken. We fight with fire, Cancer. Good luck, you need it.

You’ve taken too many lives, you’ve changed too many lives to even begin to understand. Maybe someday I’ll be able to thank you for that, but until then, please go away and never come back.