It's 2003, and the song "Cinderella" from The Cheetah Girls is playing on my TV.
I'm dancing around the living room and singing from the top of my lungs. I knew every single word to this song when I was seven years old, and I'm pretty sure as a 20-year old, I still do. For those of you who are not familiar with the song, the lyrics are about how women don't need a man to slay the dragons, and basically questioning why a woman would ever want to be "Cinderella" waiting for her knight in shining armor, when she could be her own.
Apparently, ever since I was a little girl I always wanted to do things on my own, and I always wanted to be on my own. I always wanted to pick my own clothes, get dressed on my own, and even walk from our apartment to the bus stop all by myself every morning (even though my mother still wouldn't allow it.) I was and always have been the true definition of the Kelly Clarkson song we all know and love.
I have grown up to be miss independent, and I can't tell if it's a good thing or a bad thing. I mean of course it's always good to have sense of independence in your life. But sometimes, I feel like it's more than possible to be too independent for your own good. I've been stuck in the "I don't need anyone" phase almost my whole life. I feel like now it's even more apparent because at my age most girls are dating or even getting married.
I'm writing to the women who feel like they don't need anyone, who feel like they don't need a man holding them back, or even a friend to give them advice because they think they can figure everything out on their own. You are more than welcome to keep your independence, just don't let it stop you from living your life. If you want to go on a date because you're interested in a boy that seems to be interested in you, don't push him away. If you have a problem and you don't know what you should do, ask a friend for some help. I know you're probably afraid of being disappointed, but disappointment is a part of life, and you grow with the lessons it teaches you.
If there's anything I've learned in life, it's that there is a fine line between being independent and being really, really, REALLY stubborn.
I understand that this thought process reflects the ideas of how women try to protect themselves. I get it, you don't want to get hurt, you don't want to be disappointed by anyone, it's completely understandable. Always keep in mind that people don't always have the same heart as you, but don't let that stop you from experiencing things because you're too afraid to get hurt. It's difficult to break free from that voice in your head that says "don't let anyone close enough to hurt you," and I know it's not easy to bounce back from situations that have clearly brought you down to a level you never thought was possible. But just like Hillary Duff said in A Cinderella Story," Don't let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game."
As for the last bit of advice that I have for anyone who can relate: Just remember, you can always rescue yourself without having to be the knight in shining armor at the end of the story.
