A Letter To The Undecided

A Letter To The Undecided

We've all been there.

"You still have plenty of time to figure out what you want to do."

You were sick of hearing it in high school and you're still sick of the dreaded phrase halfway through college. I know I am.

Truth is, I'm still undecided about a lot of things. What I can do with my major, if I even want to pursue my major, what to do after college, etc. Sure, I have passions for certain activities, but I just haven't found my true inspiration yet -- my calling, if you will. I've gone through a checklist of different subjects to see if any of them sparked an interest, and the results were almost frightening to me. Science? No. History? Maybe. Math? Not a chance.

It seemed so unfair. Everyone else has their lives so constructed, so why did a fuzzy future choose me? I journeyed through a phase that most people feel: Like I wasn't meant to amount to anything great. And, even presently, I sometimes feel that same way. Like there is an emptiness inside of me waiting to be filled. Everyone feels spurts of opportunity now and then. I definitely have. Watching all eight seasons of "House, M.D." can make me believe for a moment that I'm destined to be a world-renowned Diagnostician, just like how 10 seasons of "Criminal Minds" crafts me into an honorary BAU agent. Heck, I've even found myself a little envious of the Old Ladies on "Sons of Anarchy." Though these TV series aren't real, they do offer insight on career paths. They portray real jobs, and I'm sure the fictional characters took fictional time and effort to become experts in their careers.

Anyway, it did get me thinking. What is it I really want to do in my life?

The problem is, I can't give you a straight answer. Amidst my calling that's hiding somewhere in the dark, I know that I'm not alone.

My advice? Try different things from different areas of expertise and see if something sticks out to you. On a whim, I joined my high school newspaper staff four years ago, and writing discovered me. Forward four years later to now, and I still find words as therapeutic as I did then. I even participated in National Novel Writing Month, where you get the chance to write 50,000 words in the month of November. All you have to do is write these words, and you win a virtual certificate. It isn't a major reward, but I felt more fulfilled with myself than I thought I would.

Don't be afraid of what you don't know. Sure, the unknown is scary. And, sure, you won't be perfect at everything you try, but you won't know until you take action. If I wouldn't have started my novel, there is no way I would have ever crossed the finish line.

And don't count Google short! The search engine has actually spoon-fed me plenty of food for thought. It has aided me in narrowing down the countless possibilities in the world of writing. I may not have a direct path yet, but I haven't -- and won't -- give up the pursuit to fill this uncertainty.

So, here we are. Hopefully, you feel a little more at ease with your personal unknown. As for me, I sit sipping green tea, still unsure of myself. My mind is as clueless as it was in high school, but I do know one thing: When I do find what it is I want to do, I'll be pretty spectacular at it.

Cover Image Credit: Pinterest

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I'm The Girl Without A 'Friend Group'

And here's why I'm OK with it


Little things remind me all the time.

For example, I'll be sitting in the lounge with the people on my floor, just talking about how everyone's days went. Someone will turn to someone else and ask something along the lines of, "When are we going to so-and-so's place tonight?" Sometimes it'll even be, "Are you ready to go to so-and-so's place now? Okay, we'll see you later, Taylor!"

It's little things like that, little things that remind me I don't have a "friend group." And it's been like that forever. I don't have the same people to keep me company 24 hours of the day, the same people to do absolutely everything with, and the same people to cling to like glue. I don't have a whole cast of characters to entertain me and care for me and support me. Sometimes, especially when it feels obvious to me, not having a "friend group" makes me feel like a waste of space. If I don't have more friends than I can count, what's the point in trying to make friends at all?

I can tell you that there is a point. As a matter of fact, just because I don't have a close-knit clique doesn't mean I don't have any friends. The friends I have come from all different walks of life, some are from my town back home and some are from across the country. I've known some of my friends for years, and others I've only known for a few months. It doesn't really matter where they come from, though. What matters is that the friends I have all entertain me, care for me, and support me. Just because I'm not in that "friend group" with all of them together doesn't mean that we can't be friends to each other.

Still, I hate avoiding sticking myself in a box, and I'm not afraid to seek out friendships. I've noticed that a lot of the people I see who consider themselves to be in a "friend group" don't really venture outside the pack very often. I've never had a pack to venture outside of, so I don't mind reaching out to new people whenever.

I'm not going to lie, when I hear people talking about all the fun they're going to have with their "friend group" over the weekend, part of me wishes I could be included in something like that. I do sometimes want to have the personality type that allows me to mesh perfectly into a clique. I couldn't tell you what it is about me, but there is some part of me that just happens to function better one-on-one with people.

I hated it all my life up until very recently, and that's because I've finally learned that not having a "friend group" is never going to be the same as not having friends.

SEE ALSO: To The Girls Who Float Between Friend Groups

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Planning to make your new travel video? Use one of these songs as your perfect background music!


Based on the mood you're currently feeling, here are 20 different songs categorized by when you should use them for a traveling music video:

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