To The Girl I Considered My Sister,

There are so many things I would like to say to you but haven't had a clue how. We went through so much together, we were the best of friends all through out middle and high school. You were there for a lot of hard times but a lot more good ones. The end of our friendship hurt more than I ever could have imagined. I had always hoped that if there came a time when we weren't friends it would be due to distance or busy lives, not you deciding to walk away.

I hope one day you can understand my point of view.

The end of our friendship was one of the worse experiences of my life. You started to make bad decisions and started to forget about me. I never had a problem with you having other friends, but it became clear that you made me a last priority. You stopped telling me about the things going on in your life and then got mad when I wasn't aware. Your priorities shifted to a different type of lifestyle and I started to see a change in you. I'm sorry that I became concerned with your behavior. I understand learning from your mistakes and living your life to the fullest, but it never seemed like you learned. I only wanted what was best for you and you completely blocked me out.

I hope you've realized that our friendship ended because you chose to end it.

I repeatedly said that I wanted us to remain friends but I couldn't let myself stay involved with someone who had their priorities so misplaced. You made that decision to keep doing what you were doing. I couldn't allow myself to be treated so poorly. I couldn't let you walk all over me anymore. Whether your actions were due to personal problems you decided to leave me out of or just that you didn't want me in your life anymore, they couldn't be excused. I'm sorry that you couldn't understand why I was so worried about you or why I was so worried for our friendship. I know I am not a perfect person and there were some things I could have done differently, but I didn't want our friendship to end.

I hope that one day you realize your words have consequences.

I think the hardest part about losing you as a friend was that you turned into someone I never thought you would be. You were always aware of my anxiety and how I overthought everything, yet you still said the things you did. The lies you said about my friends and the ones you brought my family into have stuck with me much longer than I would like to admit. I guess if it made you feel better to tear me down so much, then so be it, I may be able to forgive but I will never forget the things you said. Your words have made me question my own self worth and made me reevaluate the majority of my relationships. I can understand now that it was only done out of irrational anger but I refuse to continue making excuses for you.

I hope you've told the whole story.

We were friends for a very long time and it was expected that we would become very close with each other's families. For them to know the whole story of why we aren't friends anymore you would have had to tell them about all the things you did. I can only assume that didn't happen, so I'm sad that your family must think so little of me now. They probably think I'm this evil person who was just out to get you, but it was in fact the exact opposite. Obviously during an argument there are things said that may be regretted but it was started with my concern for your well-being. I've told my family about everything, so they can come to their own conclusions so I hope your family's view of me isn't tainted with the half truth. I hope that your family knows that I will forever be thankful for them welcoming me into their home and always treating me so kind.

I hope that you find happiness.

Just because we are no longer friends it doesn't change the fact that I want you to have the best life imaginable. I hope you settle on one guy and that you'll treat each other right. I hope you have a lot of kids and that maybe you could teach them to be kind and to treat people with respect. I hope that you'll be successful in your career and that it is all you imagined it would be.

Writing this letter to you is one of the hardest things I've ever done. I think about our new lives and how time has gone by and how you have no idea what is going on with me and vice versa. Sometimes I catch myself forgetting that we aren't friends anymore. It's hard living in a world where I'm not laughing with you. When the time came you were going to be my maid of honor, you would be the godmother to my first child. Now, we may happen to see online that the other has a major life change going on, but will have nothing to do with the process. We'll have nothing to do with each other's life. And honestly, the person you became is not someone I want in my life. Your negativity was contagious and the energy of my life has only inflated since we ended our friendship.

I will always miss our friendship from the way it was before. I will always be thankful for the good times we had. We shared too many memories and laughs, and I want to thank you for allowing me to play such a big role in your life. I couldn't tell you how many times I've wanted to pick up the phone and call you in the last couple months, but couldn't. I've come to realize we were meant to be in each other's lives for a small time, and you've taught me so many things. I'll miss you forever, but I will not miss the mistreatment, ridicule and excuses that surrounded it at the end. I only wish you the best and that you can learn from our friendship and treat your next best friend better. I would have stuck with you through anything, had you let me.

Sincerely,

The Girl Who's Heart You Broke