Dearest Mami Nohemi,

It's been 13 long and painful years since I last felt one of your so cherished hugs. Since you last kissed my forehead and reminded me in person how much I meant to you. I was your little girl when I departed and now, 14 years later, I am a young adult making her way through life by herself.

It hurts to miss you this much.... but I cherish our memories together, all of them. Like the one that comes up to my head every time I see this picture- we took this picture after you had been angry at me for chopping off my bangs. I wish I was still that young because everything felt so easy and life was amazing with all of us together.

I can only remember the last time I walked away from your house- I was just a little 9 year old girl who didn't understand what it would mean to be miles and miles away from such an important person like you. During those years, you raised me and shaped me to become the person I am today. I am grateful for so much but I'm afraid that there's no words that will ever explain that for me; you were, and continue to be one of the most important people in my life.

It is true- no one can ever, ever understand the struggle and the pain that some immigrants put up with, when being countries and continents away from their loved ones. I've felt every single bit of that pain and I wished I hadn't grown up to know it. I know we have been blessed with your presence for so many years, and I can only wish we continue to be blessed so that I can see you soon. I miss everything about you- your hugs and your home cooked meals and the way only you knew how to wipe off my tears while making me feel better.

Mami Nohemi, I want you to remember that though we may be away from each other for now, just know that even during my long commutes to work, while I read my favorite novels, why I eat a cooked meal, and during all of my daily dos and donts, you are constantly on my mind and you are missed; that the love we have for each other strengthens more as the distance grows longer.

I know you have aged as I've grown up, and that your health is deteriorating little by little, but I know you're a strong woman-- I know so because you've always been the only one to manage to keep the family together.

You are a great woman who taught me a lot and while I am aware that we are closer to seeing each other, I can only dream of the day I finally get to see and touch your beautiful face and feel the warm of you body while you hug me tight once again.

Love,

Your granddaughter Silvia