I don't even know how to start this because I don't think my words would ever be enough to capture how much I miss you. This year is coming to a close, and to realize I haven't seen you since August is one of the most heartwrenching things I've ever had to come to terms with.
I miss our car rides to random places simply because we didn't feel like being at home all day. I never thanked you enough for those rides to dance class almost every day for 18 years. For driving me over an hour and waiting in the car for three hours while I danced and always pretending you weren't bored. I can't believe how much you care about me and how willing you were to sacrifice the things you wanted to help and support me.
You were and always will be one of my best friends, and sometimes it's hard not being able to get in your car after school and cry on your shoulder because life is getting rough. Even as a college student, there have been many days where I craved a hug from you or just getting to have another conversation in person. There have been so many times I think about being a child and waking up to you cooking breakfast for me before school, and how you got up each morning at the crack of dawn to make sure I made it to the bus stop.
I was more than lucky to have you as my mom. I didn't deserve all the incredible things you did for me and still don't deserve the random gifts you send and the surprise Amazon orders I receive from you.
This was the first year you didn't get to see me dance at all, and I hope you know I danced my best when I imagined you in the audience. I miss you being my biggest fan and never admitting that I made a mistake. I know I got mad at you when told me you never noticed my mishaps, but I realize now that I was lucky enough to have someone always pushing me up and never letting me fall down.
This past year without you hasn't been easy. I loved college and freshmen year was wonderful, but I wish you were to hear about the drama and meet all my friends. I wish you were here to get coffee with me every morning and listen to the random crap I always told you.
I think about you all the time and wish we had just a little more time at home together. I miss the craziness of dance competitions and early mornings to late rehearsals and late nights of tech weeks where you'd somehow show up with food no matter what time it was.
I'll never forget how many days of school went by where I was thinking about a certain food and you magically showed up with just that. You are one of the kindest and most wonderful people I have ever met, and when I see you again, I think I will need a month to catch you up on everything.
Forever and always your baby girl,