As long as I have known you, you have literally carried happiness everywhere you went. You were always laughing about something and were always finding a way to make my days brighter. Your innocent spirit and overwhelming optimism were such a positive influence on my own development. You loved life with all you had, and it showed. Now, the smile never quite reaches your eyes, and you’ve lost that seemingly boundless energy. It’s in your laughter, in your actions and in your life: you have depression.
I want nothing more than to take all of your pain away. You deserve to feel amazing about yourself and your life. I always wanted you to be happy in everything you did. I grew up my whole life being protective of you. I wouldn’t let any boy break your heart or any girl talk bad about you. But this is something I can’t stop.
I can’t fight your depression. So I decided to write for you instead.
First off, depression is not weakness. It is not being too lazy to leave your dorm. It is not being a pessimist. It is an illness, and it needs to be treated as such. There is a complex imbalance of chemicals in your brain that can lead to your fatigue, negative thoughts and loss of interest. You can’t tough out your feelings, and no one should expect you to deal with this on your own.
I want you to know that anything you need I will be there for you. If you need to talk to me at 3 a.m., do not hesitate. If you need me to come eat ice cream and watch trashy reality TV with you, I will hitch-hike my way there. If you need someone to understand what you’re going through, I will try my very best. I will do whatever you need me to do to fix you.
All of your pain hurts me more than you can imagine. I just want you to have that same spirit about you again. But just as with any illness, it may take time. On the road to recovery, you can’t go it alone. Be it counseling, medication or any support system, I don’t want you to fight this by yourself. I will be by your side the whole time, reminding you of your worth. Please remember that depression does not define who you are, and you are not going to feel like this forever, I promise. Maybe you’re a bit broken, but that’s okay. Just because you’re broken doesn’t mean you can’t be fixed.
