People will try and tell you the right way to do just about everything in college. From how to study and eat, to who to date and hang out with, opinions are always present. This doesn't mean you have to listen to them, especially advice about dating. College is the time for experimentation, for dating and trying out different types of relationships. Freshman year, especially, it seems ridiculous to seriously date anyone. So what happens if you fall in love? Is it wrong? I write this letter to you.
Dear College Freshman girl who has fallen for a boy,
I know that you're scared. I say this because I've been there. And when I went through it, I looked for some type of article that would tell me if it was all going to be worth it. Is it too soon to fall in love? Should I have a boyfriend freshman year?
The truth is-- I can't tell you if it's going to work out or not. College is all about growth and finding yourself, and sometimes you need to be alone to find out those things about yourself.
At the same time, I know what it's like to meet a boy and feel like it's fate that you've meet. You can't help when a person walks into your life. I also know it's impossible to convince yourself to deny how you feel about someone. Sometimes you meet a person who is there to teach you things about yourself you wouldn't have been able to learn alone.
My freshman year boyfriend and I had a whirlwind of a relationship that I will never forget. Now, as a sophomore and after dating a year, we decided together it was better if we didn't date anymore. But that doesn't mean I regret the time we had together. We both grew so much freshman year and reached a place where we both needed to experience college as single people. We didn't end on bad terms--sometimes people just grow apart and that's okay. I'm excited to learn so much more about myself, and will do so by not having a boyfriend in college.
Do I think my ex and I rushed into a relationship? Maybe. Maybe not. I can't go back and wish we met a year later because maybe the people we are now wouldn't be right for each other.
Just remember this-- People are going to judge you and tell you it's too soon to have a boyfriend in college. They are going to say the same things to you they said to me, and I didn't listen and I don't regret it.
Follow your heart. My mom always told me it's better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. You'll always wonder what could have been someday if you don't try.
Love,
The girl who's been there
