Dear 15 year old self,
You can't wait to be an adult and out on your own but please wait. The world is a bigger place than you ever imagined. You feel like your only way out of the pain is to grow up faster but it's not. Take your time with life and don't rush things. As cliche as it sounds, take time to smell the roses.
I know you're trying to fill a void in your heart with boys. You crave attention and love and mistakenly find that with undeserving boys. Grace the world with your independence. You're strong and smart. You can do everything on your own. When someone makes you feel like you're not good enough, ignore them. Keep your head held high and remember you are so worthy and so loved by many people. By the time you enter college, you will have been loved by an incredible amount of people.
Value your independence. Know that it is okay to eat alone at lunch and it's okay to be single. Stop hating yourself, you're beautiful inside and out, no matter how your peers view you. Don't doubt yourself, you are a good friend, daughter, sister and writer. Never doubt that you deserve respect and love as well.
Don't waste your time with those who don't deserve you. Don't let them make you feel like you need to hide what you're passionate about or change yourself. Run far away from people who bring drama into your life. Leave anyone who celebrates your failures and disappears for your successes. You don't need them in your life. You have too much work to do. Like loving yourself!
Please, please, love yourself. Stop harming your body. Your body is a temple and you need to take care of it! Be proud of yourself, rather than shameful. You have nothing to be ashamed of, you're beautiful. All those hardships you're going through are not your fault.
Lastly, put your fear aside and get help when you need it. It's scary, I know. You're going through more than you thought possible in only your 15th year of life. So much is happening, it feels like you might lose your mind. But let those who love you in. Sometimes walls are meant to come down.
Also stop putting up peace signs in your profile pictures. We will grow older and regret this later.
Love,
Your college self
