Love lost,

Not for intimate relationships,

but for myself.

That's what I would've said four years ago.

I struggle with understanding my strengths.

Everyone around me is doing something with their life.

I'm trying to build mine.

Not sure what to do so I write.

I write, study, make coffee, then I sleep

What else can I do?

It's not like a tv show.

You don't automatically get a job by simply having a nice conversation with a CEO then BAM.

You're in.

Trying so hard to find my niche.

Most people already found theirs.

I guess I'm still trying.

It's not a bad thing to try.

So I go outside, sigh, soak in the beauty of what the world has to offer,

Take a deep breath, then exhale.

Get your mind off of the pressure.

Listen to some tunes or listen to a podcast.

I've recently listened to more podcasts than I do music.

It's inspiring because some podcasts are about,

Writer's block or finding self-love.

I remember I lacked positivity,

self-esteem and confidence.

I didn't love myself at all.

I wished I was someone else.

Being in college made me realize,

I'm not so bad.

I can do something.

I can write, not sure If I do it well,

I can strategize and think creatively

Sometimes I can surprise myself.

There's more to myself than I show others.

My social anxiety has decreased, at least a little bit.

My confidence is better.

Guess letting go of negative people and environment really helps.

Know what else helps?

Youtube!

I always seek advice from there and it really helps my organization skills, self-confidence and there's so much to write about and explore.