Be prepared to let go of familiar faces throughout your journey. Be ready to let go of anyone who doesn’t clap for you the way you clap for them.” - Reyna Biddy
I have always selected the people I chose to be surrounded by with a great deal of caution. I don't believe in wasting people's time or playing games because if you are important to me, I will make it known. However, if I find that a friend is hindering me, pulling me away from my truest self or stalling my growth as a person, I let them go.
I used to be really awful at this, to be honest. I surrounded myself with as many people as possible when I was growing up because I was infatuated with popularity. But as I have gotten older I've realized that sitting on a glass table of a friendship is not one I would like to have.
When I was in high school I was in the business of changing people. I was absorbed with thinking I could influence people into being better friends, or at least the kind I needed. I convinced myself that these friends were good ones because I didn't think there was better. I settled. I have since learned to stop settling. You can't just keep watering the same dead flower over and over and expect it to bloom again. I was being dragged through friendship after friendship while clinging to the people that made me feel small and unimportant. My happiness wasn't relevant unless theirs exceeded mine. I'm not saying these people were bad friends, but they just really weren't good ones to me.
I think that's a really important thing to remember. I once had a friend that would try to diminish my happiness if they weren't just as happy. I couldn't have a good day if they were having a bad one. Their consistent negativity enveloped me and I was tired of them not being able to see all the greatness on this Earth because they thought they were the whole world. I was constantly trying to please these kinds of people just to get by, just to say I had their friendship. I was always saying yes and maybe when I wanted to say no.
I've learned in the past few months and years that you have to consistently be unapologetic for what you feel and the person you are. Compromising does nothing but put a temporary band-aid on a bullet hole. It just takes pieces of you away and you end up getting cut when you try to put them back together again. The people which you choose to be surrounded by are the reflections of what you would like people to think of you. Therefore, constantly being with negative souls will do nothing but damage yours. Take the time to cultivate your group. Handpick the people that will build you up into the person you've always wanted to be. Don't be sitting there 4 years later with a friend that's making fun of you in front of a boy to make themselves look better. Don't settle for the friends that steal. Whether their theft be a person or a piece of you, keep true to your most faithful of friends. Remember that when you lose someone and end a friendship, it will never be the same exact person that returns if you chose to rekindle it. You can't always choose the way people leave your life, however, you can always choose what to do with the space they have left. Fill it with light. Fill it with positivity and love, and never compromise yourself in fear of losing a friend because that will only result in you losing pieces of yourself.