As college approaches in less than two months, I have been doing a lot of thinking about where I want my life to go. To be honest, I don’t have much figured out. Lately, I can’t seem to get a grip on life. It just seems to be rushing by so quickly, and I get swept up in it. I do not have any complaints though; there is a sense of clarity that wasn’t there before.

Ever since high school started, I wanted to control everything. I developed the tendency to control situations based on what they would look like in my head. I looked at people’s pictures, and wanted my life to resemble somewhat like those pictures. If situations didn’t work out like they had in my head, I felt like there was something missing from my life. Then I tried to control that too, and somehow I had dug myself into a hole. The desire to control parts of my life that I should have let life take care of was a feeling that wouldn't dissipate.

It took a year of constant change to let go of the tendency to control. I had to unlearn my ways, and understand why trying to control situations that I had no business to was all a part of letting life handle it. I didn’t need to worry about everything, and control it, because as I did that, life was flying by me. Instead, I let the controlling tendencies go, and life handle it all.

I stopped worrying about the little things, and I stopped forcing everything. That was my biggest shortcoming, I tried to force things to happen a certain way, instead of letting it just happen. I forced friendships that were toxic just because I didn’t want to lose the friend, I forced relationships just so I wouldn’t lose the guy, and I forced moments through out the year instead of letting them be the moments in my life.

After understanding that, I just let the reins go on everything I couldn’t control. I can’t control how someone acts towards me, so I let that go. I can’t force anyone to like me or have feelings if it’s just not meant to be, so I let that go. I definitely can’t force life’s biggest moments to happen at the ‘right’ time. Honestly, it’s because there are no right times for the big moments, they will happen whey they are supposed to. It will happen when it’s supposed to, love will occur when love wants too, and happiness it will come for you when you just let life make it happen.

I realized that all you have to do is, let go and dance with the flow. That is my personal motto, and yes quote me on it. Let go and dance with the flow of life. The milestones will happen, the love will come, and the happiness won’t always be fleeting.