Recently, I watched the film "How to be Single." The movie was cute and had its funny moments, but it also made me think. It made me think more about my life, and more specifically, the relationships I have. I’ve been wanting to write an article about relationships recently, but every time I would sit down at my computer to write, I found myself incapable of form a coherent idea.
What did I want to say about relationships? And what did I not want to write about? As a result of my writer’s block, this idea was put into the back of my mind, waiting form to find the inspiration to continue. Finally, after many weeks, I feel I finally feel like I’ve found the words to express what’s been brewing in my mind for so long. The movie How to be Single was simply the push I needed to continue. The movie made me realize a few things.
One, that it’s okay to be single.
This is a concept that I had always told myself I was alright with, but in all actuality, I think my sub consciousness wasn’t at times. While I assured myself that there was nothing wrong with being single, being single sometimes brought up feeling of insecurities, whether I wanted them to or not. It’s a natural occurrence to think “is there something wrong with me?” or “why am I still single?” However, I also realized that while it’s okay to have these thoughts, it’s also important to be able to tell yourself that nothing is wrong with you. Being single does not make you inadequate. Being single means you are an independent individual; it means you are confident enough in yourself to not need the dependence of another. I’m not saying that being in a relationship takes away this independence, I only believe that you should be in the relationship in the first place if you and your partner respect each other enough to allow this trust to occur.
Secondly, the right person often comes along when we least expect them to.
In the movie, one of the most independent characters connects with a guy completely by accident. She wasn’t looking for a boyfriend and I think that was the key to her finally finding her match. Oftentimes, I think when we are actively pursuing a significant other, we sometimes try to force things. The key to connecting with that special someone is to let it come naturally. If it’s meant to be, it’s meant to be. I believe that only when we’re comfortable enough with ourselves with the thought of being single forever do we truly open ourselves to finding love. I think this is true because only when we are at this stage in our lives are we willing to be patient when searching for this person. When we reach a point where we treat finding the one as a want and not a necessity, we then have the patience to wait and make sure when we do find that person, that they are the right one.
Lastly, the film made me realize how valuable friendships are.
Think about every breakup or first date you’ve had. Who have you gone to? If you said your best friend, you’re probably not alone. Best friends are the first individuals we go to when an important event has happened in our lives. They stick with us through thick and thin, through good times and bad. While boyfriends are often temporary, best friends are usually forever. Watching How to be Single reiterated to me how we should cherish our friends and how much better they make us. It made me even more grateful that I have made such good friends in my life. These are friends that I can always count on, friends whose advice and presence I truly value, and who push me to became a better version of myself. How to be Single made me realize that I don’t need a guy to feel complete in my life, but simply the love and support of friends along the way.
Well, there you have it. Those are the three of the main lessons I learned while watching" How to Be Single." I hope that you enjoyed reading about them and if you haven’t seen the film yet, I highly recommend it!
