As the semester comes to a close, I've realized how much I learned over the course of my first year in college.
There's been tears, laughs, hugs and a lot of priceless memories that have given my understanding of life more depth and meaning. Going to college is both exhilarating and terrifying, because there is both fear and excitement in a new beginning. For the first time, I had to go grocery shopping for myself, and manage my money alone. I was very independent before I left for college, but my freshman year has taught me even more about what it means to be on your own. My parents weren't here to make sure I was doing all my homework, or ask me how my day had been. They weren't here to cook a meal for me to come home to, and they weren't here to remind me about events I had coming up.
My first year of college has taught me a lot of important life lessons, and helped me realize more about who I am.
I learned how to start over. I grew up in the same city my entire life, so I knew that completely starting over in a new town would be difficult. I had to put myself out there and meet new people, and not just cling to all of my old friends from back home. I had to find organizations that I wanted to get involved in, and find people with similar interests as me.
Suddenly, I was completely in control of my own schedule, and I had all this time I needed to split between all these things that were important to me. Starting over included letting a lot of things go, which was the hardest part of moving away. You're forced to re-evaluate your life, and you find that some things just aren't worth it anymore. Whether it's a hobby, a bad habit, or an unhealthy relationship, freshman year was the time to make those cuts. Making those decisions helped me realize that letting go is difficult, sad, and sometimes scary, but ultimately you have to help yourself move upward.
I learned how to manage my time. There's lots to balance when you're juggling two lives at school and home, and for the first time, I was in total control of my time. I was forced to divide time between my family, homework, friends at school, contacting friends at home, my boyfriend, volunteer work, organizations at school, sleep, eating (you wouldn't think this would be a problem, but it's really too easy to forget to eat), work, church, exercise, and hobbies. Phew. It's a lot of long nights and cups of coffee. But it's how life works, and I'm glad freshman year has helped me learn how to figure that out a little bit. (Side note: Shoutout to coffee. I couldn't have made it through this year without you. When I'm tired, you help me get up. When I have to pull a late nighter, you're there to wake me up the next morning. You're the love of my life.)
I learned how to put myself out there.
When I came to college, I didn't know anybody. I'd grown up with practically the same core group of friends my entire life, and I was safe inside of my bubble. Suddenly, I was dropped inside this whole new place with all of these new people. It was scary, and I was forced to step outside of my comfort zone to make new friends and build myself a new community. It was difficult, but that experience definitely made me stronger and taught me more about what friendship really means. I made lots of new friends, and that made my transition into this new life in college a lot easier. They're going through the same change as you, and your community is who's there for you when your parents can't be. They're there for you when you just need a good hug. For that, putting myself out there was the best thing I could've done, because your community and friends are your home away from home.
Lastly, I learned how to give up control on things outside of my control.
Life happens, whether you want it to or not. I saw and experienced lots of heartache this year, and I had to come to terms with the fact that I couldn't stop any of it. When things happen, whether it's a death or a big fight, you have to face them with grace and courage. Life is going to mess you up every now and then, and sometimes you're not going to be able to handle it. But things have a way of working themselves out, even if you're stressed out of your mind most of the time. Just deal with the problem at hand, and try not to worry too much. Life sucks sometimes. You can't control it, but you can control how you react to it.
Once you give up worrying and caring about what you can't control, you're free to think about so many other important things.
Freshman year has been amazing. I'm so grateful for all the new friends I made and the valuable lessons I've learned. I've been at all ends of the chaotic spectrum, from my schedule being packed with too many things to virtually nothing to do but eat and watch Netflix. I've spent nights crying and I've spent nights wishing the moments would never end. I've laughed so hard that my sides hurt, and I've given long hugs to people who've lost someone close to them. I learned more about myself too; what I can handle, what motivates me, what my passions are (I may have changed my major a couple of times this year in the process though), and most importantly, things I need to work on.
Not all of freshman year was fun, but I learned more about life every single day. These are certainly lessons that I will hold close for the rest of my life, with lots of good stories and memories to hold dearly.
