The Struggle Of Self Love
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Health and Wellness

The Struggle Of Self Love

Why "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all" applies to yourself too

The Struggle Of Self Love
I am so afraid of disappointing the people I love, I often forget that I am someone I love too. And I need kindness just as much as I believe the people I love do.
~ Nikita Gill

I woke up this morning after a long week. It’s finals, so I have been studying, spending my free time in the library and any downtime is solely for falling asleep while watching Netflix or hitting the gym to try and relieve some stress. Eating healthy has been the last thing on my mind. In reality I have been turning to unhealthy food as a (bad) coping mechanism for stress.

So, it’s no surprise that when I looked in the mirror this morning, I wasn’t looking my best. I hadn't been participating in healthy habits (neither nutritionally nor mentally). But I could still make ab lines appear with some specific angles and flexing, just like I could a week ago. The excess carbs and fat haven’t buried all of my hard work.

But before I even brushed my teeth, I looked in the mirror and almost instinctively thought to myself,

Damn, I look fat.

And, just as I would react if someone else said that to me, my entire mood was brought down. I was discouraged and upset.

This interaction I had with myself got me thinking. As kids we are told,
“if you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” That’s a great saying; it rings with truth. However, this is taught, reminded, and only applied in context with other people. Never are we told this applies to ourselves too.

I would never look at someone and the first words out of my mouth would be, “damn, you look fat.” The only time I would say that is looking a Chipotle burrito. #BurritoLove. Other than that, there is no context. So why should I think it’s okay to say that to myself? Because the truth is, its not okay. We should practice what we preach first with ourselves, and always be kind.Why should I prioritize positive relationships with others over myself? I shouldn’t.

Because we rarely practice self love, this is harder. We didn't had our mothers, fathers, teachers etc. reminding us to be nice to ourselves. We never got in trouble for hurting our own feelings. So, this is going to take practice. I know I have a long way to go. My comment this morning likely won’t be the only mean thing I say to myself today; I have more experience being mean to myself than kind. But hopefully over time, I’ll learn to be more forgiving and compassionate with myself.

I challenge each and every one of you to attempt to say one more nice thing, and one less mean thing to yourself every day.

Try it for a few days or a week. Soon a week will turn into two, and then a month. Before you know it, it will be a habit.

I am going to try to make 2017 the year I truly learn to love myself, through all the ups and downs the year will bring, no matter how my body changes or what road blocks I hit with any aspect of my life. If I can become my own cheerleader, I know I’ll be more successful in what I try to do. And hopefully, a little bit happier.

Follow my journey on Instagram

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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