For those of you who took Public Speaking back in high school, I hope you are aware of what it means to give a "last lecture". Even if you hadn't gone over what it means in class, the term itself is self-explanatory. This was a recorded speech during my senior year. Please note that this was written word for word, so I apologize for any grammatical errors.

As a senior, I look back to 8^th grade; the time when I was extremely overwhelmed by the expectations in high school. I remember my times back in middle school when I was a complete slacker.

But ever since I started in ninth grade, I wanted things to change. I wanted things to be a lot easier for me in high school. And so a part of me said, “Hard work will always pay off since you don’t have to do it later.” I started working my ass off 24/7, making sure every work I get in and out of school was done. I started asking for help more often than I did before; having my teacher re-teach their lessons to me. My academic scores were tremendously high (I’ve never gotten anything lower than a 93 for all three years, plus half of this year) and my overall performance inspired many of my teachers, as well as a few students. Even though I had projects that are due next block, I somehow managed to get my work done on time (most of the time). And I’ll admit, I’ve done that a couple of times lately.

I’ve also had a couple of ups and downs when it came to relationships in and out of high school. You could say, out of a group of four or five, I was always the odd one out.

I like to display random acts of kindness towards others, even if they never returned the favor. Of course, it doesn’t mean I’m a sucker to anybody, but I know from my experiences in high school that not everybody is going to appreciate my kindness. No matter what I do for some people, I can never change their opinions about me.

Sometimes I still struggle accepting that, and it still hurts meknowing that some people in my life never really appreciated what I do for them. But that doesn’t keep me from being me; the kind-hearted, choleric, and overly active individual that I am. Sure, just thinking about what other high school students think of me or how they feel about me can be a real bother, but it would bother me more if I were to change my attitude all together just because one or two people don’t appreciate my kindness. Basically, what I got out of high school was something we all knew from the very start; before I even started my ninth grade year. It was a lesson that was inserted into my mind but not entirely understood until the moment I started seeing the true colors of myself and those around me.

We all try to find ourselves. We meet new people and see if they would accept us. But more importantly, we find ourselves digging through our own thoughts of where we want to be, and how we could clear our own names in our community.

Letting people put me down, letting something so small break me down to a point where most of my self-caring thoughts are thrown out of the window. That, truly, was something I struggled to avoid throughout middle school and high school. And it’s something I’ll always remember as soon as I step out of these doors and enter college.