This past Monday marks the eleventh anniversary of World Down Syndrome Day. Down syndrome is the full or partial extra copy of chromosome 21, which alters both physical and mental characteristics and developments of the individual. It is the most commonly occurring chromosomal condition and about one in every 691 babies in the United States are born with Down syndrome. Life expectancy for individuals with Down syndrome has increased dramatically in recent decades, and they are able to regularly attend school, go to work, create meaningful relationships and contribute to society. In fact, there’s a new reality series broadcasting on the A&E network called, “Born This Way,” which documents the lives of several individuals with Down syndrome and other intellectual disabilities. In a look into the series, Rachel, a 32-year-old woman with Down syndrome, responds to a question about what she wants the world to know about her with, “I have an extra chromosome in me, but I have a big heart too.”
Best Buddies is a nonprofit organization dedicated to ending social, physical, and economic isolation of people who live with intellectual disabilities. It provides an inclusive and supportive community for individuals to form friendships, secure jobs, live independently and many more opportunities. While I was a written member of the Best Buddies chapter at my high school, I did not make it to the meetings and hangouts as much as I wish I could. Nevertheless, I always received a warm wave and grin whenever I saw one of my best buddies. Being a part of the Best Buddies community was a blessing, one that I and many of my friends were (and still are) very grateful for.
My boyfriend’s older brother, Matt, has Down syndrome, and being a part of his life has made mine so much more exciting in every possible way. When I walk through the door at the Leighton’s house, Matt is always the first to greet me with a happy hello and a huge smile reaching across his face (very unlike Chris, who tosses me a quick nod and then goes back to playing Xbox). I like to think, and I’m sure his family and friends would agree, that Matt is much more chivalrous and gentlemanly than Chris. Anytime Chris is ragging on me for something, I know Matt’s got my back because he’s always quick to toss in an, “Anna’s right!” The amount of love and support that Matt receives from not only his family, but also from his friends, siblings’ friends and family friends is tremendous. Everyone is always ecstatic when they see Matt; he brings a certain air of lightheartedness to the room. And boy, I don’t think I’ve ever met anyone who can dance as well or as long as he did at his twenty-first birthday party—Matt definitely has some rad dance moves in him!
The reason people fear having a child with Down syndrome or being around someone with Down syndrome isn’t because of the diagnosis itself, but because of its commonly accepted misconceptions. If we are conditioned to be scared or wary of someone with a disability, then we will feel fear or anxiousness when we are around someone with a disability. However, I would like to encourage readers to suspend their judgement and have an open-mind the next time they meet a person with Down Syndrome. Many people might think that having Down syndrome is a burdensome responsibility, but in reality, the general public is not well-informed when it comes to Down syndrome. Yes, there are hurdles and obstacles when it comes to raising a child with Down syndrome —for example, the children may face predispositions to other medical conditions and poor social treatment from their peers—but that doesn’t make the child any less human. Like us, people living with Down syndrome have feelings and emotions too, and they are very much aware of the way that people treat them.
We are all different people, and we all have our own unique characteristics that make up who we are. But sometimes I think that society is afraid of this type of “different,” so we act defensively. I often see people become tense or nervous during social interactions with people who have Down syndrome or other intellectual disabilities. And if we’re being honest, I was like that once too. Although I regret my past actions, I’ve learned that there’s no reason to be scared or nervous. There’s no reason to be anxious about talking to or spending time with someone who has a disability. I’ve learned to embrace those differences and to be accepting of everyone. Some people have lisps, some have buckteeth or a limp and some people have an extra chromosome. Why should that matter? People with disabilities still wake up every morning and go about their day just as we do. They shower; they brush their teeth and go to work or school, just like we do. They experience happiness and sadness the same way, and they fall in love, just like we do. When we judge people quickly, it doesn’t occur to us that we are always on the outside looking in. It’s important to remember the positivity, joy and normalcy that comes with Down syndrome. Instead of staring, mocking, or fearing those with Down syndrome or any other disability, try to befriend, love, and welcome them with open arms.
In conclusion, a quick ode to some great people:
First and foremost, Matt: You’re an amazing guy and I’m so happy and grateful that I have this opportunity to be a part of your life. And even though you’re a Cowboys fan, you’ll always be my favorite Leighton (well, maybe tied for first place with Patriot)! I hope that you always stay golden; you’ve got such a bright future ahead of you!
Second, a huge shout out to Mr. and Mrs. Leighton: Just as you are lucky to be a part of his life, Matt is also very lucky to have such loving and supportive parents!
Third, to Alana Rosen, Lauren Schutz, and Jessica Amarant: the three people whom I have watched enjoy and devote countless hours to be with their best buddies. I have always admired your passion and loyalty.
And finally, to Chris: If I hadn’t met you, it’s very unlikely that I would have met Matt. So to you, I am very grateful for the opportunity you have given me.
