Being a mother of whatever age you may be, it’s hard to live your life without having some type of judgment and unwanted opinions from people. Whether they are from your close relatives to people you walk past in the mall, people will give their snobby looks, rude remarks, and “advice”. I think I speak for all mothers who feel as though we can’t do anything without SOMEBODY passing some kind of obnoxious comment. Especially us young mothers, who are still trying to figure ourselves out and get a hold on life with our new bundle of joy. God forbid I had an unnatural color in my hair- or a nose piercing or a noticeable tattoo... I bet you a million bucks I would be judged within the first hour. No one gives us any slack. Just because we are moms DOES NOT mean we have to rid of our personalities and interests and most importantly our styles.
I have just a few personal experiences from when I was pregnant with my son and present day.
When I was (very noticeably) pregnant, I had strikingly bright purple and platinum blonde hair. I cannot tell you how many snotty looks I received from people in public. I’m not going to lie, it really made me uncomfortable and made me feel crappy about the style I willingly chose. (As if I weren’t terribly uncomfortable already). I could already hear the comments in those peoples’ heads: “Wow a young pregnant girl with a crazy hair color, she’s probably trashy.” But the truth is I’m really really not and it truly saddens me that people choose to judge a book by its cover. Also around this time, whenever I would take the subway, many people would not give me their seat. I don’t know if it was because of my stylistic choice or if they were just absolute pigs… probably a little bit of both!
Why do people feel the need to judge a woman on the way they wear their hair? The way I wear my hair is my choice, and it does not make me any less of a mother, a woman, or an individual in general. So what if a woman walks around with bright blue hair with her child? It’s her body and she can decide whatever she wants.
Another thing I would like to point out is the fact that so many people judge mothers who go back to school or work right away. I for one went back to school LESS THAN A WEEK after I gave birth and went back to one of my jobs about 2 weeks after. Why is it a problem that I do not want to stop my education and continue pressing on for my son? Why am I ridiculed for going back to work so quickly even though I really need the money? The amount of time I spend with my son is, in my opinion, a very healthy amount and I am very blessed to have such a supportive family to help me continue my education. This also doesn’t make me any less than a mother. I work hard and I do it all for my son. Some mothers choose a different path and that’s perfectly okay!! But unfortunately, as the saying usually goes, “Damned if you do damned if you don’t.” I believe that is the absolute truth especially when it comes to motherhood. But please do me and many other mothers a favor and MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS. If you don’t like it, just keep your looks and nasty comments to yourself. We choose what we make of our lives and we as mothers know what is best. Leave us and our colorful hair, bold fashion statements, and educational/career paths alone. Thank you :)
