It’s painfully difficult not to begrudge certain aspects of your body, your personality, and everything in between. Every girl knows this. Even the guys of our generation are coming to understand this pressure. There is this preposterous standard set for us in regards to what we look like, what we drive, how we act, what clothes we wear and countless more-but what’s even worst? We set this unachievably high standard ourselves. It wasn’t until I caught myself doing it the night six sororities walked into the restaurant where I work that I decided-enough is enough. Why do we feel the need to constantly compare ourselves to those around us? Why does it seem impossible to fully love our bodies and all of the other wonderful things that make up our character?

These are both questions I had a difficult time answering, and an even harder time trying to convey to the rest of the world. I know from my own personal experience when I wake up every morning, I look at myself in that mirror hanging in my bathroom and critique myself worse than Chef Gordon Ramsay does the cooks on Hell’s Kitchen. What I don’t do? I never once have reminded myself of all the beautiful and unique things about myself. I couldn’t even begin to tell you why this is but now every morning: I wake up, I brush the terrible knots out of my hair, remove the yucky goop from my eyes, brush my teeth, stare straight into that mirror that once appeared so daunting and give myself four compliments. The compliments differ each and every morning. While this seems like a rather odd way to boost my self-confidence, it has one of the biggest impacts on my day and has ultimately helped alter the way I see myself.

While the self-given compliments may seem silly to those of you reading who insist you have unwaivered self-confidence, it works for me and may even work for others struggling with similar problems. See the fact of the matter is, everyone has insecurities. They’re inevitable and rather than being ashamed of them, we should be embracing them. So that’s what I am going to do, I am going to list off all the wonderful things that make me Erin Ashley Cone, all of the things I once thought I needed to conceal and I encourage everyone reading this to do the same.

• I read entirely too much, and yes if I could I would live in Barnes and Nobles.
• I am actually a size six- not a size four like I have always told my friends and relatives. I’ll pick a cheeseburger over thinner thighs every day of the week and twice on Sunday.
• I think my belly button is too big and abnormally deep. Yes I know, odd, but who in the world even has a “nice” belly button? It’s literally a hole in your stomach.
• I have freckles. Everywhere. I love them. My mother refers to them as “fairy footprints”, so Hah! The fairies love me a great deal more than most.
• I am so pale you can see my veins. Hey, it works for me, it makes my green eyes and plum colored hair look amazing.
• My laugh sounds like a witch cackling in the night on her broom stick. It’s actually quite impressive and is in high demand when Halloween rolls around.
• My sister and my boyfriend are my best friends. I always seemed to yearn for this massive group of girl friends who did anything and everything together, and often took for granted how wonderful it is to have two people know you inside and out. Plus, less drama- there’s enough drama on Grey’s Anatomy for me, I can do without my own.
• My eyebrows are never on “fleek”. They’re eyebrows. I am completely content with the “unfleekness” of them.
• My left leg is a tad bit shorter than my right. My parents and close friends think I am bonkers and being a complete hypochondriac, but once upon a time I noticed it and used to be petrified that someone else would notice too. Now?-I tend to agree with my parents and chalk it up to the fact that I had a flare for the dramatics and hardly pay attention to it myself.
• I have a subtle yet visible stain on the bottom of my two front teeth. This to me was my number one insecurity. The stain was caused due to the three years I wore braces and prevented me from showing that rather pricey smile for entirely too long. Now, I will never stop cheesing.

It is hard to love yourself, and even more so in a society that throws around the “perfect image” a little too often. This is not an excuse for us to demean our own image, our own personality, and even our own existence. We are all imperfectly perfect. I am over the self-hate, the constant comparing of myself to every girl that walks by me. I am all about me, myself and I and you should be all about you. It doesn’t matter who or what you are-white, black, green, small, large, skinny, thick, dumb, smart, too smart, too dumb- because there is only ONE you. So own it. All of it.