It has been a while since I have seen you last smile, and it has been a while since I have heard your voice. Your absence from me is still present, and I think of you every day. I miss your laughter, your kindness and your passion. Everyday is a struggle, whether I see your face on social media or a thought breaks into my brain. But I promise you, I am OK.
I am OK
Because you taught me how to laugh.
I am OK
Because you taught me how to cry.
I am OK
Because you taught me how to learn.
I am OK
Because you taught me how to dance.
I am OK
Because you taught me how to sing.
I am OK
Because you taught me how to fear.
I am OK
Because you taught me how to love.
I am OK
Because you taught me how to smile.
I am OK
Because you taught me how to live.
I am OK
Because you taught me how to take chances.
I am OK
Because you taught me it is OK to not be OK.
But I am not OK.
I am not OK
Because you are gone.
I am not OK
Because you were my light.
I am not OK
Because you left too soon.
I am not OK
Because I had so much more to learn from you.
I am not OK
Because I am not OK and that is OK!
Dealing with the loss of someone you love can be the hardest heartache. Despite what we may believe, the five stages of grief are very real, and we experience them whether we want to or not. The longer you push away those feelings, the harder it will be to cope with the loss of your loved one.
When dealing with grief, you can experience the stages separately or you can experience many stages at once. I personally have experienced multiple stages of grief at once. There is no right way to grieve and that is OK. As one of my role models once told me, "Feel what you feel." You are only hurting yourself if you try to mask the horrible feelings inside. So if I could leave you with anything significant that I have learned in the past seven months, feel what you feel because that is the best thing you could do for yourself. But remember, it is OK not to be OK.
