Chivalry is dead and good riddance. To me, any act of chivalry that a man makes seems like an assertion of dominance over his date. Thanks for paying for my dinner, opening the door for me, or (Lord help me) ordering my dinner for me, but I can do those things for myself. It’s not that I don’t appreciate a man going the extra mile, it’s that I am a millennial who was raised to be independent, and that’s a good thing.

Chivalry may be dead, and I, as a woman, take responsibility for killing it.

Chivalry may be dead, but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Our whole world is changing and modernizing, and the way we date should be too. Let’s take turns paying for dinner. I can pick you up for our dates.

But the death of chivalry doesn’t mean the death of romance, and men shouldn’t blame women for the way they want to be treated in the 21^st century. Don’t be bitter, men, be better. There are plenty of ways to be romantic without making women feel inferior.

Toxic masculinity is real, and chivalry bears an uncomfortable resemblance to a transaction between man and woman. Man holds the door open for woman, she’s obligated to talk to him. Man buys woman dinner, she’s obligated to be appreciative and to show her appreciation by going home with him.

Chivalry is dead, and this is a good thing. Those in the dating pool are now on a level playing field. Relationships aren’t supposed to be transactional.