Isn't it odd that it is easier to make others happy than it is to make yourself happy? It's crazy to think that something as little as saying "good morning" or holding the door for someone can make their day, but to make yourself happy, that's another story.
I was always one to make sure everyone else was happy before myself. I was constantly doing for others to the point where I forgot to do for myself. My first year after graduating high school was definitely an eye opener to me. College really does change a person's mindset and perspective. It was then when I decided to put my happiness first. In order to let yourself be happy you must do this.
1. This is KEY: LOVE YOURSELF!
No, I am not quoting Justin Bieber's song (although it is very catchy and now stuck in my head), it is important to love your mind, soul and body. The mind has the power to make a person overthink. However the mind also has the power to bring happiness and positivity. It is the way that you look at things that will change the way your mind thinks. Your soul is such a sacred piece of you. Your soul is who you are, it is where your happiness lies. Most importantly, your body. I cannot stress this enough. It is so important to love your body, every inch of it. Flaws, scars and all. I was never one to believe the quote "If you do not love yourself, you cannot love another person." I did not believe this until I realized that it is true. In order to love someone wholly, you need to love yourself inside and out. Once you love yourself, it feels as if a thousand bricks have just lifted off you. Come to terms with the fact that you are beautiful, and you own it, girl.
2. Not think that everything and everyone is out to get you.
I was notorious for thinking this. I am not putting the blame fully on me because there are some pretty nasty people out there. Some people are out to break happiness. Maybe it is because they don't have it or they want what you have, who knows. However, once you create that bond with yourself and your happiness, it is one that cannot be broken. I'm not saying once you let yourself be happy, you will never be sad. You're not human if you don't have good and bad days. (We all can't be Beyonce, right? I mean I wish but that's not the case.) What I am saying is, your mind can play tricks on you. You may think someone is trying to subtweet you or mess with your happiness, but every tone and intention is changed once it is not in person. Social media has the power to hide an attitude and tone used, which is why there are misinterpretations all the time. Do not have the mindset that everyone is out to get you or someone wants to break your happiness. Let go of the thought that you can lose it and you will be happier. Everyone is just trying to get by in life. Do good to others and good will be done to you.
3. Let go of who is bringing you down.
Growing up, our parents always tell us "who you hangout with is who you are." It is so important to have a group of friends that lifts you up and who have goals. Having a positive and loving group of people who support you no matter what will only make you want to succeed and be happy because you have their support. You know you are loved and nothing beats that feeling. Once you let go of the people who point out your flaws, judge you for how you live your life and are just condescending to others, you're one step closer to your happiness. Personally, this was the best decision I have ever made and it opened so many new doors in my life. I realized who was there and who was not. A smaller group of friends who support you and genuinely love all of you is better than a large group of phonies.
4. Do whatever the hell you want.
If what makes you happy is "Instagramming" more than one post a day, taking shots of tequila with your girlfriends on weekends, obnoxiously singing 90s throwbacks in the car while you're stuck in traffic after working a double or posting on VSCO anything and everything, then girl, you do you. Ain't no one stopping your happiness! Do not let anyone rain on your parade. At the end of the day, your happiness and sanity is the most important. Not everything who makes you happy makes the next person happy, but that's OK. We all have different ways of expressing happiness. Never let anyone hinder yours.
5. Live in the moment.
Life is too damn short. People are here one day and gone the next, and if that isn't the most scariest thing to you, I don't know what to tell you. Life is too short to not take a chance or act spontaneously. So, go out with your girlfriends and go kiss that frat boy that think is cute because hey, you may see him walking to class the next week but who says you have to ever speak to him again? Exactly.
6. Give yourself "YOU" time.
Alone time is just as important as time with the people you love, but sometimes even the people you love can get pretty annoying. So in order to avoid that, give yourself alone time. Go finish that Netflix chick flick that made you wanna search for your soul mate, or be Blair Waldorf and eat $10 macaroons while sitting in a bubble bath. Who cares? Relax your mind and body. "You" time not only helps give you a center to your happiness, it also helps give you sanity to finish that research paper you've been putting off. (If you're reading this, professor, I can explain.)
7. Try to have a positive outlook to everything.
OK guys, I promise my Blair Waldorf obsession is not kicking in right now (I'm probably lying). Life comes with good and bad. There are going to be things that happen that will absolutely crush your heart, and then there are going to be things that happen that will make you cry happy tears. Crazy how life works, I know, but with every bad situation comes strength. Being a strong person is not easy when things come crashing down. However the more you train your mind to think "OK, tomorrow is a new day," or "everything happens for a reason, I will find that reason." The effect of the situation feels a little less heavy. Every reason why things happen comes out, whether it takes hours, days, or years. You will find an answer. So in the wise words of Blair Waldorf, "Have a little faith, and if that doesn't work, a lot of mimosas." Who doesn't like a good mimosa?
8. Have a person.
We all need somebody to lean on...! *obnoxiously singing* No, but all jokes aside, this is important. It is very important to be able to be strong and support yourself but sometimes you need that one person to hear you rant so you can keep your sanity, and sometimes all you need is a hug. Whichever it is, it is very important to have at least one person you trust with anything and everything. Life gets tough and it is important to have someone there who reminds you that you are loved and things are OK.
9. DO NOT, and I mean DO NOT, put effort into those who don't put effort into you.
Some people learn this hard way and some people learn this the easy way. I cannot stress this enough. If someone is not giving you time, it is because they are choosing to not give you their time. Everyone has a busy life, however, if you really care for someone you will make sure they know that. Whether it is a simple good morning text or a "hey, hope you're doing well, sorry I'm busy" type of text. Effort is key. Effort can be as little as that or as big as showing someone they are valued. Do not waste your time with a person who makes you a last priority. What you settle for will not only define what you think of yourself, it will only allow that person to think the way they are treating you is OK.
10. Enjoy life. Put that damn phone down for once.
We're all consumed with who is posting what, who broke up with whom, what hashtag is trending, and who's WCW is who. OK, just wondering, is that going to matter a week from now? Probably not. It is normal to see a couple out to eat, not speaking, just refreshing their Twitter feed. Um, boring. Create bonds, strengthen your relationships, enjoy the outdoors, go take a drive, something. A piece of technology should never enhance or define your happiness! Enjoy the little things of life while you still can.
11. Lastly, ACCEPT yourself and everything you have done (mistakes included) to become better.
OK Hannah, let's sing it, "Everybody makes mistakes, everybody has those days." *trying to not type all the lyrics as I'm singing* But it's OK, you get the point. We all make mistakes. We all have done someone wrong or had wrong done to us. Forgive yourself for the mistakes you have made, and try your best not to do them again. Forgive the others who have done you wrong, even if they did not apologize. Forgive but never forget. Forgiveness is a step closer to self peace. Nothing feels better than that. Accept yourself, including your flaws, your good days, your bad days, your moodiness and your quirks. When others see you love yourself, they will see you in a better light. The law of attraction is real. Happiness has such a domino effect. Let go of any negativity and go spread your happiness in every way you possibly can.
Now JBiebs, this is where you come in. "You should go love yourself." In the most selfless way, please love yourself.
