Therapy: A service many of us need, but so little of us use.

You know those days where everything is just, bad? Where it seems like everything is going wrong and you're losing control of your day, your thoughts, your emotions and well, everything?

I had one of those days very recently.

A little backstory on me: I've struggled with depression for so many years. I remember vividly the first time I had thoughts of self-injury - I was only 10.

As I grew older it only got harder. Parents divorced, middle school came and I felt so alone, high school came and a toxic boyfriend came along, and so did the growth of social media, contributing to bullying.

Now, just because I listed these issues doesn't make them the cause of my depression. As I stated, as a 10 year old child I had my first thoughts of self-harm. However, these factors just contributed to my feelings. I always felt as though I had nobody. Yes, I had my mom, but my depression was such a hard issue for me to open up about I decided not to.

Instead, I let it grow. With the growth of my depression came extreme anxiety.

Going through a drive-thru if there are no other cars there? Forget it. Ordering pizza over the phone? Nope. Leaving a voicemail? Nope. Parties? Big social gatherings? School events? Not going to happen.

I just kind of became this girl with depression who stuck to what she knew - going to school where I wouldn't talk to anyone, going to work to be with the people I knew and only going to social gatherings if it included my family.

As I've gotten older I've learned ways to cope with my depression and anxiety - partly with the help of my dear friends, having a mom who understands, teaching myself new strategies to not let these things define me, and overall just focusing on my happiness. That's all I want, that's all anyone wants - happiness.

However, just because I've learned coping strategies over the years doesn't mean it's gone.

Recently I had a bad day. It started with an anxiety attack at 6:00 a.m, then I felt the depression start to set it because of some workplace issues, and then someone hit my car and drove away. As a whole, the day was terrible. I was in an absolute panic, depressed and hopeless state. I felt numb.

In the middle of my day I found a crisis text hotline - CrisisTextLine.org.

To be completely honest, in the midst of my panic at work I went to the bathroom and searched "what to do when I want to hurt myself", on Google.

I know I am better than that. I've come so far. I haven't self harmed in so long, why would I relapse? It's been years.

I was able to gather myself and before I could talk myself out of it, I texted "connect" to 741-741.

I sent my text message at 9:59 a.m, and at 10:00 I received, "Resources and coping skills while we connect you: (a link to a website). What is your crisis?" I responded at 10:00 saying, "I am depressed. I am in a panic. I want to hurt myself. I haven't done it in years. I don't think I will, but, I need help" Again, at 10:00, I got a message saying, "Thanks for sharing It might take a moment to connect you".

This is when I started to feel like this was going nowhere. Take a moment to connect me? One moment can turn into hours. But then, at 10:01, a message popped up in the chat.

"Hey, this is Dee. I'm here to help you as best as I can today. I'm hearing that you are having the urge to harm yourself today, is that right?"

This woman was a saint. I received text messages back from her within two minutes every single time. The best part? You can tell you're talking to a real human. The messages are empathetic, helpful, so kind and genuine, and you can tell these people have a passion to help.

The conversation went on ( I will not include more details ), and I found peace.

A simple conversation with a stranger talked me down from such a stupid, stupid decision. Who would have thought?

When she would send me a message and I would not answer she would say things like, "It's been a little while since you responded. I'm here for you if you still want to talk."

This stranger, while yes is her job, is checking up on me more often than some of my friends ever did. More than some of my family ever did. That is what makes this service incredible - the passion, the willingness to be there, to have someone to hear you when you feel like you have nowhere to turn.

The volunteers go through extensive training to make sure they can properly help someone in a crisis. After my incident, I looked into volunteering myself, however, the time dedication is so extensive that I can't manage it. But this shows that this nonprofit really cares about their mission.

This service has processed over $1 million messages to date, and it is still growing rapidly.

I would recommend this service to anyone who is struggling. The service is free, available 24/7, and is confidential.

With the advancement of technology comes more services like this, and hopefully we can all come together and start helping those who are struggling.

This post is not an advertisement, not a sponsorship, and there are no affiliate links - I am providing details about my experience with this hotline.