From the moment that your parents held you in their arms, you became the most valuable and precious thing to them. Ever since that moment, they have done everything in their power to keep you safe, and to support you no matter what. During your childhood days when you would fall and scrape your knee playing capture the flag with your neighborhood friends, your mom practically had a heart attack seeing you bleed.
One of the worst feelings that parents feel is seeing their child in pain. Whether it is physical or psychological, it kills them to see you like that.
What happens, though, when we see THEM in pain?
One day, when they are in their late seventies or eighties, we will have to reverse the roles and care for them. We hope to see them pass away peacefully in a warm bed because it kills us to see them in pain. This is a normal phase of life, taking care of your parents one day while still caring for your kids. One of the worst feelings, though, is witnessing your parents in pain now, when you are still young, and they are only in their late or mid-fifties.
Unfortunately, thanks to your hippocampus and amygdala not being fully developed, you cannot recall memories before the age of three. I am not able to remember being on my dad’s shoulders, because when I was five, he hit the ocean floor at the beach. From that moment on, he has had numerous back surgeries and neck surgeries. From fusions to rods in his lower back, he has lived with pain every moment of every single day of his life.
When he would come home from work, I would run towards him and want to jump into his arms. There would always be this look in his eyes as if he would start to cry at any second while he would tell me not to pull on his neck. On field day in elementary school, dads would be giving their sons or daughters’ piggy backs from event to event, while moms would hold the water bottles… instead, I walked in between my parents.
Witnessing him go through another back surgery a year ago, two days before Christmas, was not necessarily the most enjoyable way to spend your Christmas break your sophomore year of college. You just feel helpless. My dad always told me “I would take the pain away if I could,” whether I had a really bad sore throat, or when I sprained my ankle really bad that one time. This is exactly how I have felt for the majority of my life. I would take his pain away if I could.
It is a sickening feeling, seeing our parents cry, or sad. For some of you, you’ve seen your parents go through a divorce when you were really little, or maybe you have heard your mom or dad crying at night after they put you to bed because they are simply just so stressed about their career. It was hard to understand, you couldn't understand.
For those of us who have grown up and have seen your parents in pain, when you were at an early age, then you know what I’m talking about when I say that it changes you. It strengthens you. It changes your perspective and outlook on life. When you hear people complain about the littlest things, it is hard for you not to become frustrated. You have seen so much pain, that the smallest pain doesn’t even affect you anymore.
To the ones who have lived with seeing your parents in pain every day, remember how strong that they are. Remember how strong it has made you, and that GOD gives his battles to his strongest soldiers.
Daddy, I love you. Thanks for being the strongest person I know.
