I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not always gung-ho about my flaws and quirks, essentially what makes me, me. I’ve noticed that it is a trend, among teens and young adults to dislike things about ourselves. Self-acceptance can seem so hard to come by when you’re young and worried about being liked and accepted. It can be a tough reality to face when you realize that not everyone will like you and you’re not going to get along with everyone. These unmade connections and social in-acceptances can occur throughout your life. It’s a part of life. You won’t be liked and accepted by everyone, but that shouldn’t get in the way of you liking and accepting yourself.
Ask yourself what do I like about me? If you can’t answer right away, think about it. Let the question steep in the back of your mind like tea in your favorite teacup, let it sit for a bit.
While you think about what you like about yourself, ask yourself some other questions pertaining to your character, these questions may help you come to some answers about what you like about yourself.
- How do you treat people, regardless of their relation to you?
You may want to include how you treat animals or the environment. By asking yourself this question you can be honest with yourself and gain perspective. The only person you have to answer to is you. Do you like the way you treat others? If not, this may shed light on why you’re not accepting of yourself.
- Do you keep yourself open and approachable to new ideas?
This question can create insight into why you may not be accepting of yourself because maybe you’re not accepting of others or open to learning about new ideas and perspectives. You may be stuck in your ways and not even know it.
- Who/what do you care about? What are your hobbies?
Why do you care about these things/people? What do you like about the activity? How does it impact your life/ identity? Would you be a different person if you didn’t have these things in your life or do that activity? Asking these questions can also shed light on who you are by highlighting what it is you care about.
With these questions laid out, I implore you to think about who you are and what you like about yourself. It can be deep or just above the surface, as long as you get started and acknowledge what it is you like or don't like about yourself and maybe even what you’re proud of or not proud of.
I know sometimes it can be tough to think about what it is you like about yourself, I’ve been there. I used to tell myself that I didn’t like anything, sometimes I still do. But, when I let the question sit in the forefront of my mind and think about it without letting my self-doubt pour in and without over-thinking it, I am able to come up with a few things that I do like about myself.
- I treat people the way I would like to be treated
- I’m considerate of others
- I believe in protecting people’s rights (and animals too)
- I love my family and friends unconditionally and don’t give up on them
- I am forgiving
- I don’t give up even when I so desperately want to throw in the towel
- I’m a warrior, every day I battle my mental illness and even though some days are harder than others I’m still fighting and surviving
- I can laugh at myself and admit when I’m wrong
- I don’t get caught up in drama
- I’m a deep thinker, even though it gets me in trouble with myself sometimes, it also makes me come back to reality and remember reason
Now it's your turn! Create your own list, and start the habit of loving and accepting yourself. Not everyone is going to love you or accept you, the only sure person whose love and acceptance you can rely on is yours. Besides, there are too many people in this world who don’t love themselves, you can change that by learning to love yourself. With each person who learns self-love, there’ll be one less person in the world who doesn’t love themselves.
Let’s inspire self-love.