It happens all at once. You are out with your friends and something happens, whether it be a spilled drink or a nasty text from a boy. You immediately jump up and work out a strategy to fix whatever the problem is. You know exactly who you are — the friend mom. Every group has one and every group loves them. If you are not sure whether or not you are one, here are some obvious (and some more obscure signs) that you are indeed the mama bear of your group.
1. You have a magical bag that carries everything you may need.
Just like Mary Poppins, your handbag is full of only the essentials. Aside from your phone and wallet, there are pens, pencils, umbrella, snacks, a first aid kit, flashlights, emergency contact information and maybe even an entire living room furniture set. All right, not the last one. You are always prepared whenever you go out with your friends for anything and they have come to rely on it.
2. You are in control of the check when you go out to restaurants.
Splitting a check is the bane of all existence when everyone is honestly just trying to have a good time. As the de facto head of the table, you pick up the check every time and figure out what everyone owes. It always ends up with someone in distress because they think that there is no way to pay with a card, but you eventually make them see the light. Everyone will breathe easier once it's done, especially you because something was actually accomplished efficiently.
3. You are the one who calls the restaurant when you order take out.
There is an art to ordering takeout with your friends. You figure out your options (usually pizza or Chinese). You assemble the group order and finally, you call it in. For some reason, it is the calling where the plan could go awry (probably because no one wants to cause a scene when ordering up to ten pizzas and assorted sides). That's where your mom instinct comes into to save the day. You deliver the order to the restaurant with skill and help your comrades obtain the late night snack of their dreams.
4. You clean your friend's rooms when you go over.
As soon as you walk through their door, you know what you have to do. Within 20 seconds, you are putting trash in the proper receptacles, picking up clothes to reveal a floor underneath and making the aesthetic actually artsy again. Deep down, you understand that it will be dirty again as soon as you leave. You still do it anyway, because you love your friends (and because you need a place to lay on the floor).
5. You give them all the advice that they could ever need.
The fact that you are all the same age does not matter. You've seen things, you know things, you must impart your knowledge. You are the wise sage of the group, giving out little pearls of wisdom (some of which is direct from Netflix). Your friends constantly text you about boys, school, and stress — but you are more than happy to help them in any way you can.
6. You ground them if they are being stupid.
Just like a real parent, sometimes you have to give your kids tough love. Who cares if they are full grown adults and can make their own decisions? You will still take their phones away when they try to text their ex who you know will eventually just screw them over again. It's a hard job, but somebody's got to do it.
7. You make sure they are safe at all times (even to the point of craziness).
Yes, there will be times when you are not with your babies. Just like any self-respecting mother, what do you do? You make sure that you know where they are ... constantly. It might be a little excessive to text them five times in a row while they are napping to see if they want dinner, but it just shows how much you love them.
8. You host family dinner nights.
You may be a poor college student who should be eating ramen for every meal, but that doesn't stop you from pulling out all the stops and cooking a big meal for 10. Sometimes, the domestic urge just needs to be itched and honestly who doesn't love free food? You put something in the oven, text the squad and wait for the party to begin. Not only is it a great excuse to get everyone together, but you get lasagna. It's a win-win.
9. You will stop everyone mid-stroll to take a picture.
I was walking down the streets of London the other day and made my friend stop while she was at an ATM because she was under an underground sign. Just like moms want to save every moment of their children for posterity, you take a million candids of your friends while out on adventures so that they have plenty of options for social media. They consider themselves so #blessed for your skills.
10. You refer to your friends as your children.
Whenever you break out the "children" call, they know that you mean business. Whether they are distracted by a dog or are too insensible to make their way across the street, breaking out that old chestnut reminds them to fall in line and trust that you know what to do. It's also just really amusing.
11. You are actually called mom by your younger friends.
I don't mean this in a sarcastic way like, "Oh my god, mom, I'll do it eventually!" I mean like when you congratulate them for doing something great and they say, "Thanks, mom!" Once, I literally walked into a room for a concert and my three sophomore children called out, "Mom! You're here!" Even though I did not birth them, it is an honor to be a friend and a mother to so many.
