Words get taken out of context all the time.
"Blood is thicker than water," is a phrase used often, and we interpret it to mean family bonds and ties should matter more than anything else. But the original phrase, in context, means the exact opposite. The original phrase is, "The blood of the covenant is thicker than the water of the womb." Very different meanings with very different contexts.
Context is everything.
Take this symbol:
It is a swastika. You may assume the context to be the German swastika and the Nazi party, associated with several negative connotations. But in fact, it is the Hindu swastika, a religious symbol used for millennia invoking peace and well-being. In the wrong context, it's easily understandable how and why this symbol would be looked upon unfavorably. In one context, it is a symbol of brutal oppression, mass genocide, and racism. In the other, it is a symbol connecting centuries of tradition to peace and harmony. One symbol invokes fear, the other culture, peace, and faith.
Context is everything.
And things are misunderstood out of context. Things are, words are, even people are.
For people, the context in which you read them is culture. This would include ethnic culture but goes even beyond that to take circumstances into account as pieces of an individual's culture. Individuals create microcosms of culture for themselves, like a series of Venn Diagrams of all the different cultural contexts that intersect to create the unique, microcosmic culture of you.
My personal Venn Diagram might look something like this:
Take a person who belongs in one culture and put them in another, they often find themselves lost or feel out of context. Take a person and put them in even just one of their circles and they still might feel out of context. Or, they might not feel complete, like they are in the exact place where they belong.
In February last semester, I wrote a poem titled "Lonely," and I talked about how I felt incapable of giving the love I wanted to receive, how I felt like I was in the wrong place and with the wrong people, how I felt empty because I was just floating through the days. I felt like I didn't like myself, because I couldn't fit in.
Last night, I added an addendum to this poem, because now I understand why I felt this way. I was in the wrong context. I wanted so badly to be a part of the culture I was seeing around me, with the friends I had made in Alice Palace. At the time, they were the only culture I knew in college, but they only fulfilled two little sections of my Venn Diagram, UMich and American Millennial, and they didn't fill those entirely either. I was just in the wrong context.
This year, I met the guys across the hall, who are Indian and in Ross, and who not only get my jokes and references but laugh at them too. This year, I got closer to the people in Apex, who are as driven and motivated as I am and who understand my career aspirations. This year, I found people who would want to go to a Hasan Minhaj show with me. I found people who dance to my favorite songs, who tell me I have good taste in music, who learn the choreo to Mahi Ve with me. They talk in stupid Indian accents and fondly recall childhood beatings. They drink my chai and understand that it's not a bad thing when the milk boils over. They call me Riya Aunty and they let me call them Chacha. They giggle knowingly when I accidentally drop a casual Hindi word into a conversation. They get excited over paneer and dal chawal. They are incredibly hard workers. They choose to study at the Ugli on Saturday nights. They skip game days to watch movies instead. They coach me on my career decisions and understand why it's a big deal that I worked up to courage to talk to L'Oreal and Amazon recruiters on the fly. This year, I found people who are part of my world and who get it. Who get me.
I found people who fill in more pieces of my Venn Diagram. I really like these new people I've met, and now I really am starting to like myself.
Because yes, being around people that are entirely different from you, you do start to question yourself and your own legitimacy. You start to not like yourself because you feel like you aren't the right puzzle piece for this puzzle. Now, after I've found the right groups of people, I feel like I've found the right puzzle to try to fit myself into.
