The holiday season has arrived, and with it will brings the visiting of family members you perhaps only see around the holidays. All whom are anxious to catch up, of course the usually three questions will come up,
How is college?
What are you plans for the future?
And of course the oh so notorious question inquiring about your personal romantic life , or lack of.
Are you seeing anyone?
Frankly from my experience with it most people only really are interested in the third question, for it's the most relatable and produces more of a interesting discussion topic, from the others point of view. Whereas question one and two would actually require said person to be engaged in an educated conversation, and frankly who wants to talk about the economic and the struggle to find internships over a holiday dinner ? I mean I would prefer to talk about those topics but that's just me. I am not calling people out and saying it is a bad thing, because it makes perfect sense because almost everyone can relate to the third question, moreover than the first two. But heres where I find the problem, is when your reply to the third question is a " no I am not seeing anyone."
Leaving said person feeling the need to sympathizes for you, replying with phrases along the lines of, " oh I am sorry, I am sure you'll find someone," or "don't worry someone will come along" and the famous and perhaps the worst reply of all " but your so pretty you're bound to find someone."( My thoughts on that question are complex it would take a whole entire article to cover just that alone.) I understand said person is just reacting how they feel they should, but here's the thing there's no reason to take pity on a college student who isn't in a relationship. Franky I am tired of people thinking that you need to be with someone to be completed, and the fact the many people think you can't plan your future without a significant other exhaust me. Because here's the thing I am in college, I am hear to learn to expand my minds to find parts of myself, and if I find someone in the process of all of that that is great but if I do not don't feel sorry for me. For if I am with or not with anyone it doesn't define me. Besides why become involved in a relationship and risk taking away from my education, most relationships end but the education I am gaining keeps giving . So instead of asking me questions about my non-existant romantic life thinking thats what will define my future. Ask me these three questions instead, and I promise you, they are more defining than any relationship ever will be.
What's the favorite topic your learning?
Have you read any good books/listen to any good music lately?
What do you WANT to do with your degree?
Those three question will answer the initial three, just in a nonconventional way. If there was someone who was worth mentioning ,I 'd guarantee I would mention him. But until than let's carry conversations on matters of greater substances than college relationships, and try not to cumulate the seven pounds of holiday weight the average person gains.
