There are a million and one articles out there from college freshmen wrapping up their first year of college (just like me). And a lot of them are saying the same things - because they're all true. Freshman year was a wild ride from start to finish. I got to experience so many new and wonderful things that I never could have imagined and I've met some of the best people I have in my life. However, as the year comes to a close, I'm faced with the prospect of going home. I'm (once again) picking up my life and packing it into boxes in preparation of the end of the year. I know not everyone goes home for the summer, but as one of the many who are returning home - I'm sure I'm not alone when I say I have some mixed emotions about going back.
First off, I'm super excited to go home. It's exciting that I can take a break (much longer than any summer break during high school). I'll work so I can make lots of money, spend time with my friends at the lake or goofing off around town. I'll get to spend a mostly unlimited amount of time with my dogs. I won't have to climb down from a loft anymore. Shower shoes can be shelved until I come back in August. No more communal bathrooms or hearing my neighbors through the walls. I even sometimes wonder if the summer after freshman year might be the last summer you have to enjoy if you're not already loaded with college classes and internships (because I know I qualify for at least one of those categories).
But I found a place up here, and I'm going to miss it. I'm going to miss the friends from my floor, because no matter how annoyed we got with one another, they were there when other people weren't. They're your first community in college. I'm going to miss my roommate. The one who braved living in a shoe box with me for a solid eight months (because sometimes I think my family got tired of living with me and hello... we were in separate rooms). I'm going to miss the groups of people I've met on this campus because they won't just be a ten minute walk away if I want to hang out with them or if I need to talk to them.
I'm also a little bit scared to go home. I've spent the last year being independent, making my own schedule, and following my own rules. I think going back home is going to be a readjustment for both my family and myself. The town, the place, the people... they probably haven't changed too much. As for me? I've changed. I wonder if my friends have changed like I have and I'm nervous. But mostly, I'm excited.
Ultimately, I think I just have mixed emotions about my freshman year ending. I don't know how to feel about going home and I don't know how to feel about how fast the past year has gone. One day I'm starting kindergarten with my ScoobyDoo backpack and today I'm finishing the first step towards my big kid job. Life works in weird ways, but man. It's been a good year.
