"I need a hero. I'm holding out for a hero 'til the morning light and he's gotta be fast, and he's gotta be strong, and he's gotta be larger than life." This song, "Holding Out for a Hero" should have been on my mind a little more in the past couple years, but not because I NEEDED a hero, I just needed to stop falling for the villains.
I've realized that there is a fine line between a good guy and a bad guy.
I've also realized that I'm typically uninterested in good guys because the bad guys are pretty good at pretending to be good just long enough to lure me in. The bad guys can be charming, charismatic, intelligent, and utterly perfect, but they have an expiration date for this facade. This being said, there is always the added appeal of being the girl that the bad boy decides to turn good for. My life has kind of resembled Taylor Swift's "Blank Space" because "I can make the bad guys good for a weekend," but then time runs up and they hurt me.
Maybe they actually are good guys, so no matter how much they hurt me, I will give them the benefit of the doubt and call them "squires."
Knights have to be squires before they're knighted, and squires have to complete a quest in order to earn their knighthood. Unfortunately for me, most of my squires put me in distress rather than rescuing me. I've saved myself and been my own hero, but just because I'm capable of being one, it doesn't mean I don't kind of want a knight in shining armor.
I'm fiercely independent.
I think that in order to keep my independence, I went for the wrong guys. I'm not so different from a guy when it comes to commitment, I just pretend that I am. In order to keep myself as my own hero, I often found myself in the company of bad guys, or maybe just guys who were bad at being good. I've never really felt like I needed a hero before, and that is mostly because I don't need one, but it sure would be nice if I stayed away from the villains or stupid squires or whatever you want to call them.
As 2016 rolls around, I am swearing off squires. I am holding out for a hero or no one at all. I'd rather live out my life merrily and by myself than have an unnecessary disturbance from the squires. This means I will no longer fall under the bad boy spell. By no means am I even looking for a hero, for as I've mentioned before, I'm perfectly capable of being my own hero, but I've decided that I should listen to my dad and stop "wasting the pretty" on knights in training who have forgotten how to behave.
