If you consider yourself a maverick, an explorer or an individual who wants to try everything out there in the world, having a consistent pattern of breaking-up-and-making-up with your partner can excessively jeopardize your mental health. In fact, a lot more than that. Ironically, TV and movie relationships are maybe an ideal example of it. Furthermore, earlier research from the University of Missouri has evaluated that more than 60% of adults have been engaged with on-off relationships, and more than 33% of cohabiting couples revealed separating and later accommodating eventually. For various reasons, splitting and getting back together isn't generally an awful sign for a couple. However, for some couples, it can enable individuals to understand the significance of their relationship. However, a consistent pattern of such behavior is trouble.
In my opinion, this could be one of the leading reasons why more people are unhappy and feel lonely especially youngsters. In the age of speed dating and emoji SMS conversations, it seems like relationships are becoming shorter and shorter due to various reasons. In fact, it has been shown by many forms of research that it could lower your performance rate in school and/or at work. Every relationship should be based on absolute dedication toward his/her significant other instead of an obligation like either a financial reason or they believe they have put excessively time into the relationship if they decide to get back together. The three significant consequences associated with breaking-up-and-making-up are:
1. Higher rates of abuse and other behavior
Many types of psychology and behavioral science research have shown that breaking-up-and-making-up relationship pattern is associated with an accelerated increase in anxiety and depression and such disappointment can be seen in the form of higher rates of abuse. Most of us take people whom we love for granted. In this case, a let-go personality of one person can be taken for a granted by another person. Both verbal and emotional abuse contribute to one of the significant personality characteristic, "self-esteem."
2. Poor communication and lack of control over temper
A willingness to open-hearted over an unwillingness to open-minded may become a thing. An individual tends to bring up the past more often during arguments, exhibits passive-aggressive behaviors, and minimizes things in a relationship. Holding grudges and throwing all your past mistakes and arguments in your face every time you argue in the present may become a routine. However, healthy partners do commitment completely. Also, being controlled or under obligation as previously discussed can provoke anger and one might lose the control over his/her temper.
3. Lower levels of commitment and transparency in the future relationship
First of all, both men and women can suffer from relationship anxiety and commitment phobia, although traditionally it was thought fundamentally to be a male problem. Fear of not being in the "right" relationship or having been in, an undesirable relationship which can be characterized by abuse or disloyalty. In fact, such fears are common an outcome of breaking-up-and-making-up relationship and an ultimate cause of the lower levels of commitment and transparency of thoughts and feelings about each other in the future or existing relationship.
In order to preserve your well-being and to not let these toxic factors to influence your overall behavior and life, you should consider taking the following steps:
1. Analyzing and learning from what you've done in former relationships can help you to find out what prompted the breakup or reconcile? It's pretty much like a relationship inventory if you want to think like it.
2. While considering reviving a relationship that ended earlier or maintaining a strategic distance from future breakups, you should consider the reasons you guys separated to decide whether there are constant or determined issues affecting the relationship.
3. Keep in mind that it is all right to end a toxic relationship. For instance, if your relationship is hopeless, don't feel regretful about leaving for your psychological or physical prosperity.
Checking in and out of a relationship, cycling can indeed cause anxiety and mental pain so one should stay away from it no matter what. As I have discussed earlier, as a short-term relationship is becoming a thing, it's crucial to protect yourself from such a tornado. See you next week!