why guys can't take no for an answer
Start writing a post
Swoon

Boys, I Shouldn’t Have To Say I’ve Got A Boyfriend For You To Leave Me Alone

Spoiler alert: I don't owe you a conversation.

372
Boys, I Shouldn’t Have To Say I’ve Got A Boyfriend For You To Leave Me Alone
Arianna Zakrzewski

Ladies, we've all been there. You're out with your friends, or messing around on social media, when suddenly you find yourself wrapped up in a conversation with a boy who just doesn't seem to understand the meaning of "no."

You try to be as polite as possible—if you're anything like me, you're probably afraid of his reaction if you just told him to leave you alone—so you find ways to get the point across as nicely but firmly as possible. The number one excuse most girls use is, "Sorry, but I've got a boyfriend." And that pisses me off.

To preface what I'm about to say, let me just establish that, yes, I do have a boyfriend. But I've felt myself forced into using this excuse years ago, even when I didn't. And here's my issue with that.

I do not owe you a conversation. Whether it's out at the bar, or in my Twitter DMs, I don't have to talk to you. But I like talking to new people, so if someone strikes up a conversation with me then I'll join in, at least for a little, to be friendly. The problem is that so many boys take "friendliness" as a sign of attraction. You give them an inch, they'll take a mile.

And I mean, that's fine. I'd be lying if I hadn't ever thought, "Wow, this person is being really friendly, they must be into me!" and been wrong. I feel like everyone does it. But the problem lies in that revelation that you're wrong, in how you react to it.

When it's happened to me, I've been able to recover. I can take "no" for an answer. If you're not into me, that's fine. When I was younger (and single) it might've hurt a little, but I could respect that I was wrong.

When I've been on the other end of it, those boys don't take "no" for an answer. They're persistent. I can tell them how uninterested I am a billion different ways, and they still believe I'm just playing hard to get. Spoiler alert: I'm not.

I feel like the fall-back for most girls is the boyfriend excuse. Like I said, I've been doing it for years—at least since I was 15, honestly. But the older I get—and the further into my relationship I get—the more angry it makes me.

Boys, I don't need to tell you I've got a boyfriend for you to leave me alone.

If you actually liked me in the way you claim, you'd respect my decision and go away. If you had any sliver of respect for me—or, let's be honest, women in general—you wouldn't push it. You'd bow out gracefully. But instead, you don't stop until I tell you some other guy has already staked his claim.

Which is complete bullshit, honestly.

I'm a person with my own autonomy. I do not belong to anyone. I am not anyone's property. You cannot "claim" me.

Take my no for an answer. Not my relationship—real or fake. Show me a little respect, please.

Report this Content
Featured

Panic! At The Disco Announces Breakup After 19 Years

Band Makes Breakup Announcement Official: 'Will Be No More'

5291
panic at the disco

It's the end of an era. Originally formed in 2004 by friends in Las Vegas, Panic! At The Disco is no more.

Brendon Urie announced on Instagram that the band will be coming to an end after the upcoming Europe tour. He said that he and his wife are expecting a baby, and the life change weighed heavily in his mind to come to this decision. "Sometimes a journey must end for a new one to begin," he said.

Keep Reading... Show less
Content Inspiration

Top 3 Response Articles of This Week

Odyssey's response writer community is growing- read what our new writers have to say!

10201
https://www.pexels.com/photo/person-writing-on-white-book-1043514/
https://www.pexels.com/photo/person-typing-on-type...

Each week, more response writers are joining the Odyssey community. We're excited to spotlight their voices on as they engage in constructive dialogue with our community. Here are the top three response articles of last week:

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

To Mom

There are days when you just need your mom

20495
To Mom

There really is no way to prepare yourself for the loss of someone. Imagine that someone being the one who carried you for 9th months in their belly, taught you how to walk, fought with you about little things that only a mother and daughter relationship could understand. You can have a countless number of father figures in your life, but really as my mom always said, " you only get one mom."

Keep Reading... Show less
Swoon

The Way People In Society are Dating is Why I Don't Date

I need someone to show that they want me for me, not that they're using me to chase the idea of being in a relationship.

21832
The Way People In Society are Dating is Why I Don't Date
rawpixel

You hear your phone go off. He's asking you to hang out. Then, of course, you get the advice of your friends to decipher this text. Is it just hanging out or is it more than hanging out? You've probably done this at least once in your life or at least seen a tweet where someone posted their screenshots with a potential love interest.

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

Winter Break As Told By 'Friends'

Is a month at home too much to handle?

13913

If you're anything like me, winter break is a much-needed light at the end of the tunnel after a long, stressful semester. Working hard for 15 weeks can really take a toll on a person mentally, physically AND emotionally. It's a nice change of pace to be back at home with your family and friends, but after a couple weeks, it can get, well... boring.

Keep Reading... Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments