why guys can't take no for an answer
Start writing a post

Boys, I Shouldn’t Have To Say I’ve Got A Boyfriend For You To Leave Me Alone

Spoiler alert: I don't owe you a conversation.

Boys, I Shouldn’t Have To Say I’ve Got A Boyfriend For You To Leave Me Alone
Arianna Zakrzewski

Ladies, we've all been there. You're out with your friends, or messing around on social media, when suddenly you find yourself wrapped up in a conversation with a boy who just doesn't seem to understand the meaning of "no."

You try to be as polite as possible—if you're anything like me, you're probably afraid of his reaction if you just told him to leave you alone—so you find ways to get the point across as nicely but firmly as possible. The number one excuse most girls use is, "Sorry, but I've got a boyfriend." And that pisses me off.

To preface what I'm about to say, let me just establish that, yes, I do have a boyfriend. But I've felt myself forced into using this excuse years ago, even when I didn't. And here's my issue with that.

I do not owe you a conversation. Whether it's out at the bar, or in my Twitter DMs, I don't have to talk to you. But I like talking to new people, so if someone strikes up a conversation with me then I'll join in, at least for a little, to be friendly. The problem is that so many boys take "friendliness" as a sign of attraction. You give them an inch, they'll take a mile.

And I mean, that's fine. I'd be lying if I hadn't ever thought, "Wow, this person is being really friendly, they must be into me!" and been wrong. I feel like everyone does it. But the problem lies in that revelation that you're wrong, in how you react to it.

When it's happened to me, I've been able to recover. I can take "no" for an answer. If you're not into me, that's fine. When I was younger (and single) it might've hurt a little, but I could respect that I was wrong.

When I've been on the other end of it, those boys don't take "no" for an answer. They're persistent. I can tell them how uninterested I am a billion different ways, and they still believe I'm just playing hard to get. Spoiler alert: I'm not.

I feel like the fall-back for most girls is the boyfriend excuse. Like I said, I've been doing it for years—at least since I was 15, honestly. But the older I get—and the further into my relationship I get—the more angry it makes me.

Boys, I don't need to tell you I've got a boyfriend for you to leave me alone.

If you actually liked me in the way you claim, you'd respect my decision and go away. If you had any sliver of respect for me—or, let's be honest, women in general—you wouldn't push it. You'd bow out gracefully. But instead, you don't stop until I tell you some other guy has already staked his claim.

Which is complete bullshit, honestly.

I'm a person with my own autonomy. I do not belong to anyone. I am not anyone's property. You cannot "claim" me.

Take my no for an answer. Not my relationship—real or fake. Show me a little respect, please.

Report this Content

A Beginner's Wine Appreciation Course

While I most certainly do not know everything, I feel like I know more than the average 21-year-old about vino, so I wrote this beginner's wine appreciate course to help YOU navigate the wine world and drink like a pro.

White wine being poured into a glass

Keep Reading...Show less
Types of ice cream

Who doesn't love ice cream? People from all over the world enjoy the frozen dessert, but different countries have their own twists on the classic treat.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

100 Reasons to Choose Happiness

Happy Moments to Brighten Your Day!

A man with a white beard and mustache wearing a hat

As any other person on this planet, it sometimes can be hard to find the good in things. However, as I have always tried my hardest to find happiness in any and every moment and just generally always try to find the best in every situation, I have realized that your own happiness is much more important than people often think. Finding the good in any situation can help you to find happiness in some of the simplest and unexpected places.

Keep Reading...Show less

Remember The True Meaning of Christmas

“Where are you Christmas? Why can’t I find you?”

A painting of the virgin Mary, the baby Jesus, and the wise men

It’s everyone’s favorite time of year. Christmastime is a celebration, but have we forgotten what we are supposed to be celebrating? There is a reason the holiday is called Christmas. Not presentmas. Not Santamas. Not Swiftmas. Christmas.

boy standing in front of man wearing santa claus costume Photo by __ drz __ on Unsplash

What many people forget is that there is no Christmas without Christ. Not only is this a time to spend with your family and loved ones, it is a time to reflect on the blessings we have gotten from Jesus. After all, it is His birthday.

Keep Reading...Show less
Golden retriever sat on the sand with ocean in the background
Photo by Justin Aikin on Unsplash

Anyone who knows me knows how much I adore my dog. I am constantly talking about my love for her. I attribute many of my dog's amazing qualities to her breed. She is a purebred Golden Retriever, and because of this I am a self-proclaimed expert on why these are the best pets a family could have. Here are 11 reasons why Goldens are the undisputed best dog breed in the world.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments