12 Tips To Guide You On Your Journey Of Self-Discovery

12 Tips To Guide You On Your Journey Of Self-Discovery

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We all feel lost sometimes. We embark on a mission to find ourselves, but the mission is flawed from the beginning. See, we are already found. Hence, it isn't about finding yourself but knowing yourself. There are many paths to getting to know yourself, but here are a few tips to help guide you.

1. Practice mindfulness

Meditation is a way to know your true self. All you need to know is within yourself, seeking it externally in the world will only take you so far. You need to look within. -Yut

Life is busy and messy, and we often forget to take time to relax. I'm not talking about the kind of relaxing that happens when we engage in leisure activity. We don't take time just to be. In the busy modern world, we lose touch with ourselves. A good way to regain connection with yourself is to meditate. Check out this great guide on how to start meditating. You can practice mindfulness in everyday life by paying attention to yourself and your surroundings without judgment. Do not focus on the past or future but the present moment.

2. Ask yourself, "Who am I?"

It may sound simple, but it can be effective. Who are you? What brings you joy? What are you most afraid of? What feelings are leading you right now?

3. Journal

Journaling is a great way to reflect. Here are 30 great writing prompts for self-discovery.

4. Find your core values

Your core values drive you. They help define who you are and who you aim to be. Use this tool to help you find your core values. Creativity, equality, understanding, intellectual status, and family-orientedness are among the common personal values listed.

5. Find your purpose and passion

What do you enjoy doing so much that you lose track of time? This is your flow state, and it is likely what you are passionate about. Pay attention to the things you don't like because those emotions are also useful in finding your passion. If your heart isn't in something, let it go. Check out 6 clues to finding your passion and purpose in life.

6. Look to your childhood

Even reading a favorite book from your childhood can help you discover parts of yourself that maybe have been forgotten. As children, we are naturally in tune with what we like. What did you enjoy in childhood?

7. Listen to what others say about you

People who are close to us can often tell us who we are better than we can tell ourselves. On your journey of self-discovery, ask your friends what they think about you.

8. Take personality tests

This is a fun way to get to know yourself a bit better. Try out these quizzes.

The Myers-Briggs Temperament Indicator (MBTI)
The Big 5 Personality Test
VisualDNA's Who Am I? Quiz

9. See challenges, not struggles

When we struggle, we often lose touch with ourselves. We feel lost. One way to counteract this is to see struggles as challenges. Take this quiz to discover the core beliefs that you hold about yourself. Frustration and depression may be indicated by these core beliefs.

Look at the story you tell yourself, and change it if it causes you harm. You can consciously change the story of who you think you are to fit who you want to be. This task is not easy or fast, but it is a challenge worth pursuing.

10. Practice self-care

Take some time for yourself. Do things you enjoy - whether that is a hot shower or a long run. Self-care looks different for everyone.

11. Listen to what you say "yes" and "no" to

What do you enjoy? What are you interested in? When you feel lost, these things may be unclear. Look back to the last thing that brought you joy. Remember how your body felt. That is a "yes." The things that you don't enjoy produce a different response in your body. You will become more in tune with these things when you as you become more mindful.

12. Surround yourself with people who allow you to grow

The journey of self-discovery is not a solo one, although it may feel like that at times. If you are surrounded with people who do not have your best interests at heart, then you are will not be able to grow into the best possible version of yourself. Eliminate those people from your life, and surround yourself with people who allow you to grow.


Cover Image Credit: Mark Mook via Pixabay

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Sorry I'm A Size 00

But I'm not really sorry.
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My whole life I’ve been thin—which is kind of an understatement. Every time I go to the doctor I get the same “you’re underweight” lecture that I’ve heard every year since I was able to form memories. I’ve never really felt insecure about my weight, I love being able to eat everything and not gain a single pound. Since my freshman year of high school I’ve probably only gained 8 pounds and I’m now a sophomore in college. Of course, in school, there were rumors that I was anorexic or bulimic, but everyone who knew me knew that was far from the truth. I’m now 19, 5’2, and I still have yet to break 100 pounds on the scale. It seems that there is a lot of skinny shaming going around and to me, one of the main contributors to that is the Dove Real Beauty campaign.

You’re probably wondering where I’m going with this because skinny girls get all the praise and other body types are neglected. That’s really not true, though. While loving other body types, you are tearing down skinny girls. Why is it okay to do that to skinny girls but not to other body types? Why is it okay to say “only dogs like bones” or say “every body type is beautiful” until you see a model's abs, or ribs, or thigh gap and then tear them down because they’re “unnaturally” skinny?



The point I’m trying to make is that, as a naturally skinny girl, I have never shamed anyone for their body type, yet I go every day and get at least two comments about my weight. I’m always the skinny girl, the toothpick, but I’m not Jessica. Yeah, I’m a size 00. Get over it. If you have an issue with my body and feel like my body is disgusting to you, don’t look at it. I know that I’m healthy and I don’t need your input when my body just naturally burns calories fast. I don’t have an eating disorder and never have. I am real beauty though, and I know that because I’m comfortable in my own skin. So maybe the real issue is that we as a society have been shoving certain body types down our daughters’ throats so they begin to romanticize models that have certain standards that they have to meet, who work hard for the bodies that they have, and are making a hell of a lot more money than most of the people discussing why they look emaciated while what they’re actually looking at is the photoshopped product.

I’m not going to apologize for being skinny when that is just how my body is, I can’t help it. So please, stop tearing my body down while trying to bring your body up. You can praise your body without shaming skinny girls. Shaming me for being thin does not make you better than the man that shamed your body, just as me shaming you for being curvy does not make me better than the man that shamed my body. As women, we need to love each other because we are the only ones who truly understand each other.


Cover Image Credit: Victoria's Secret Untouched

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Today Was A Bad Day, And That's OK

It's the little things that matter the most.

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Today was a bad day.

I had a nightmare last night. It was so vivid and realistic. Some nightmares I can easily forget about, but this one was difficult to push out of my mind. I woke up in cold sweats, my heart was beating fast. I genuinely felt sick to my stomach. I wish I had never dreamt what I had dreamt. The nightmare really messed me up. It was all I had thought about for most of the day.

I couldn't focus on my school work. I definitely couldn't stay focused in class. I had a pop quiz that I was not prepared for, and there was already too much built-up stress from just the past two weeks. I felt like I couldn't go on with the rest of my day. To keep it somewhat short, things just weren't going my way. I was being too hard on myself and my anxiety was through the roof.

As dramatic as it may seem, this nightmare was too personal, too scary, too heartbreaking, and not too far-fetched. Words cannot explain how dark I had felt today. It brought me to a place I thought I had moved on from.

Today was a bad day, and that's okay.

I got a call from my dad and a text from my mom, both encouraging me to move forward and not stress. There was reassurance in my dad's voice and through my mother's words. Words reassuring me they would always be there for me and loved me.

I took a trip to Gino's with my roommates. That burger was hitting, onion rings and all. These were the "perks" of my day, and though they don't seem like a lot, it meant the world to me.

It truly is the little things that can make your day. Like a call from your daddy, a text from your mama, or a trip to one of your favorite burger spots with some friends. The littlest things help you put things into perspective. These little things came to me at a point where I genuinely really needed them.

These little things distracted me from the most terrible and scarring nightmare. These little things are the things that remind me to move forward, ever stronger. These little things are the things that remind me you can turn a bad day into a good day, but only if you allow this.

Today was a bad day and there's no doubt that I will have many more. That's okay, because it's about the little things that really matter.

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