Loss.

Losing someone is one of the hardest things you will ever have to go through.

I won't say that it is easier on the people that get to see that person regularly, but people like myself who did not see my Nana as much as I should of before she died, it hurts a lot.

Once you find out that they are no longer breathing and are mentally on this earth, you grasp to find your last memory that you have with them and try to remember it perfectly, because you can no longer make anymore memories, and that is one of the things that hurts the most.

I miss my Nana more than words, we lived seven hours away from each other and I saw her maybe once a year, if I was lucky. And I now wish that I would have made the time to come up more and see her. She was always so proud of all of her grandchildren. If anyone asked about her grandchildren, she would get out our pictures and tell everything about all of us and just be so proud of us no matter what.

She was such a fun woman, she was always making someone laugh by a joke and telling a crazy story from when she was younger.

She had this thing where everything that she was wearing had to match, if she was wearing a blue outfit that day her eye shadow had to be blue all of her jewelry had to also be blue. And she always wore so many rings on her fingers, she would have more than one ring on just one finger. But that was just Nana.

You only get one Nana and I am so lucky that I got spend as much time as I did with her. I was very lucky in that way. I am so grateful that she got to watch me and my cousin graduate. Seeing us graduate was her goal that she wanted to make and she did. She also wanted to watch my other cousin marry his lovely wife and she got to see that. She got to do everything that she wanted to before she died and that’s important.

I know that she is in heaven living it up with all of our family that has gone before her and she is probably talking someone’s ear off on how proud of us she is and how she loved her funeral. She did have much but she loved what she had so much. I know that she is in a better place and that she is happy and free of pain.

Yes, we will miss her here on earth, but I know that I will see her again, I don’t doubt it one bit. She is still with us everywhere she goes. She’s our guardian angel and I am so glad to have her as one. She’s the best one I could ever ask for.

I love you Nana, more than words could ever explain and I will miss you so much, but I know I will see you again. Forever my favorite.