7 Signs You're Massachusetts Born And Bred | The Odyssey Online
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7 Signs You're Massachusetts Born And Bred

Coffee milk, bubblers and clam cakes.

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7 Signs You're Massachusetts Born And Bred
Flickr Creative Commons

Growing up in Massachusetts, there are certain things one experiences that just aren't present in other parts of the country. Despite the fact that most Bostonians like to believe they're right the majority of the time, try saying "wicked" outside of Massachusetts or try explaining what coffee milk is to someone from the Midwest. With that in mind, I've compiled a short list of things you just simply won't understand unless you grew up in the heart of colonial history.

1. You know alternative ways to use "wicked."

You're being wicked annoying, that chowder is wicked good, or you feel like going for a wicked long walk. All fair game in Massachusetts, and if you live there there is a 100 percent chance that you use "wicked" in the place of "very" often. Once you enter a different part of the country, however, you can guarantee someone will ask you how "wicked good" isn't an oxymoron, or if you happen to be referring to the hit Broadway musical.

2. You've been to Plimouth Plantation on at least one field trip.

No one is more excited than a fourth grader preparing for their field trip to the historic Plimouth Plantation, despite the fact that they've probably been at least two times prior. For whatever reason, seeing the same thatched roofs, the same people dressed in costume, and contemplating asking them about televisions and cell phones to aggravate them never loses its luster.

3. "Coffee milk" makes sense to you.

No, I don't want milk in my coffee, nor do I want incredibly watered down coffee. To the rest of the country, coffee milk is like a mythical creature that people genuinely believe doesn't exist. Regardless of how you try to explain, no one will ever understand how it really does taste like melted coffee ice cream mixed with heaven in a glass.

4. A water fountain is a bubbler and no one can tell you otherwise.

No matter where you go, unless you are in Massachusetts (or a small portion of Wisconsin, apparently or a few choice places in Rhode Island) no one will ever agree with you when you try to explain to them that a water fountain is called a "bubbler." People might agree on the delectability of coffee milk after trying it, but I can pinky promise you people will be as confused as you are when some people in the Midwest call a hair tie a "ponytail."

5. You can pronounce "Worcester" and "Cochituate" without confusion.


If you're from Massachusetts, showing your friends a list of cities and watching them try to pronounce "Gloucester" and "Leicester" is guaranteed to end in laughter. Also, just see how many people ask if "Worcester" is pronounced like the sauce. (If you're wondering how confused people really do get, watch the Buzzfeed video entitled "Americans Try To Pronounce Massachusetts Towns")

6. You know exactly how clam chowder should be made.

This one is in no way specific to Massachusetts, but more generally New England. Clam chowder should in no way be tinted red or have any sort of tomato product in it. If you grew up and/or currently live in Mass you should know: if it's not white, doesn't have chunks of potatoes in it, and is in any way similar to chowder in other parts of the country, you won't eat it.

7. You had school when there should've been a snow day, and vice versa.


Snow is a given during a Massachusetts winter, but snow days are - and forever will be - unpredictable. You have most definitely had a snow day when it didn't snow whatsoever. On the other end of the spectrum, we have all woken up to find 8 inches of snow on the ground, trekking to the bus just to listen to everyone curse out the superintendent for depriving us of an extra day to sleep in.

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