A highly anticipated press conference was made recently to finally make an announcement regarding President-elect Donald Trump's plan to build a wall on the border between the United States and Mexico.

After waving to his onlookers for forty-five minutes, Trump eventually put his lips far too close to the microphone and yelled the following: "Wall from China, here. Big wall, great wall. America, no Mexicans, one side. Other side, Mexico, no Americans. Beautiful wall. Thank you, screw Vanity Fair."

So there you have it. One of Donald Trump's first duties of President will be the relocation of the entire Great Wall of China. But how is it going to get there?

"Well, Donald's son Barron recently became Fifth Grade Class President of the United States of America," reported Kellyanne Conway with a straight face. This, by the way, means that Barron is in charge of all fifth graders in public U.S. schools. "The plan at the moment will be a field trip to China for underprivileged fifth graders across the nation, where each student will be responsible for carrying a piece of the Great Wall all the way back to America. What? Yes, they will be walking through Russia to get back here."

So where is the funding for the field trip going to come from? Many have speculated that Trump could pay for this out of his own pocket, but it appears more and more likely that they will be using fifth grade bake sale fundraiser earnings. Trump plans to cover the subsequent loss of assets for the Stand Up To Cancer Foundation by ignoring it.

"Cancer, shmancer, dancer, prancer, Rudolph," the soon-to-be-President tweeted at 4 AM this morning. "Merry CHRISTMAS, liberals!"

Sources say that the Trump Organization will also be changing the name of the wall, and by this time next year it will be more difficult than ever for someone to get from Mexico to the United States, thanks to the one and only Tremendous Wall of America.