Stop Lying To Yourself, Talking Shit Is Good For You

Stop Lying To Yourself, Talking Shit Is Good For You

At least I’m just honest enough to admit it.
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I gossip, okay? I love hearing my friends' latest drama with the boy they’re talking to, the stuff they have to say about the girl in their Spanish class that thinks she knows everything and all the sh*t about someone they just simply don't like. Everyone needs to vent and I’m here to listen, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have my own sh*t to talk. I think gossiping a little is honestly healthy as long as you’re not spreading evil and hateful rumors or saying things that are completely untrue about a person or a situation.

People have been gossiping since the beginning of time — I mean how the heck do you think people heard town news back in the good ole days? Gossip, b*tch! Talking about people, spilling the beans and blasting news has gotten a bad rep in recent years, but gossip can help us learn about ourselves and the world around us. Gossiping or spilling the tea builds community and why not unite together to pass a class you hate or make your friends feel less alone in their struggles. Listen to what’s happening in other’s lives and maybe you might just understand yourself and your environment better.

We all gossip at some point in our life so go ahead and talk a little crap because you might just learn something. Also, for all you haters out there that say you’re not a gossip or that you don’t gossip you’re telling yourself a huge fib. I’m one of the biggest gossips I know and I’m happy to admit it!

Cover Image Credit: Lindsey Ocock

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To My Best Friend Who Taught Me What True Friendship Is, I Can't Thank You Enough

"To the person who will love you endlessly, love her with kindness and understanding."
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Dear Best Friend,

You have been a part of my life for quite some time now. You have seen my good, bad, and ugly sides and have stuck by my side through it all. I don't know if I could ever find the words to truly thank you for everything your friendship has given me, but I am definitely going to try.

Our lives have taken some twist and turn these past few years, but we have stayed strong through it all.

Thank you for judging me just the right amount.

Throughout our friendship, I have made some very questionable decisions. A lot of people would say "thanks for never judging me", but I feel like everyone needs a best friend who's going to tell them how it is; to tell them when they are about to make a bad decision or how to avoid something worse from happening. You have always told me how it is (even when I don't always want to hear it), but I know that I can come to you whenever I need someone to set me straight.

You're always down to do nothing with me.

I think that you are the one person that I can call up to hang out and do absolutely nothing with and have a good time. From the nights sitting in and playing card games to ordering Chinese food and watching an entire Netflix series while I dance around with the cat: I know that we could do anything, and nothing together and it would be fun.

But also, you're always down to get lit with me.

I swear one day we will be two old moms at a bar drinking vodka crans and laughing about the stupid shit our husbands and children do. You're always down to go out and have a good time. Even if everyone else we're with is miserable, we find a way to laugh at ourselves.

You are one of the few constant things in my life.

I've lost a lot of friends in my life, but you have stayed by my side through everything. I can't remember the last time we actually fought about anything, but even when we do we can't stay mad at each other for more than a day. I know we will be in each other's lives until we literally keel over.

I want you yo know that you're the strongest person I know.

You've dealt with things that not many people go through ever in their life. You have always been so mature, and you handle everything with grace. You inspire me every day with your goals and successes and I am so proud of you and all of your accomplishments.

Above all else, you deserve the world.

It's so easy to get caught up in your own mind and think that you deserve the things that happen to you, but please know that the only thing you deserve is happiness. Please settle for nothing short of that. It may take a bit to find your happiness, but I will be there every step of the way. You're a remarkable human being, and I want nothing but the best for you.

To the person who will hold your heart someday, please do not break it. To the person who may wrong you, you will regret it forever. To the person who will love you endlessly, love her with kindness and understanding.

You, my best friend, future bridesmaid, godmother of my children, the person to bail me out of jail, the one who lets me cry on their couch for twelve hours,

I love you.

I will cherish our friendship forever. Thank you for being you.

Love always,

Your best friend.

Cover Image Credit: Adriana Ranieri

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11 Things I Learned About Having Long Distance BFFs

You get jealous of their local friends.
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Having best friends that live halfway across the country is easily one of the most rewarding— and frustrating— blessings. There are some things you learn about having a best friend who’s not present in your daily life. Invaluable things that end up saving your ass more often than not. Here's 11 things I learned about having long distance BFFs, and if you have some too, don't hesitate to let 'em know how much they mean to you.

1. You will always have an open “vacation” spot.

Doesn't matter if it's Wisconsin, Mississippi, New Jersey, or North Carolina; I always have somewhere to go, even if it's not a traditional "vacation" spot. I'm always down for the most, "nonrelaxing vacation ever" playing auntie to my favorite babies.

2. No time is too much time.

The first two days seem to drag before you find your stride (unpacking, setting up, etc) and then suddenly time is flying in hyperspeed. Nothing goes faster than a week spent laughing it up with your bestie and her fantastic fam.

3. (And you appreciate every second).

You can’t really get sick of her. You know you’re on borrowed time, and eventually you have to return back to reality, so there’s really no time to spend by yourself. You soak up every second you get with her because you never really know when the next time you’ll see her is.

4. You religiously stalk her life through any form of communication you can.

Sometimes I learn some of my best dirt from Facebook and Twitter. Sure, I learn more when I go directly to the source, but constant social media updates on her whereabouts aren’t so terrible either, especially if I don’t always have time to fire off a quick text (yes, we’re all really that busy).

5. You don’t have to talk every day to maintain a relationship (and you really don’t).

We can go days, weeks, or months without talking to each other and pick up right where we left off. The gossip is almost juicier that way. Besides, that’s how I know our relationship is built to last. I don’t need to spend every day with them, because we are just as close after time apart as we were when we did spend every day together.

6. You miss the crap out of them, constantly.

Nearly every conversation begins with, “I miss you SO much.” While missing each other when we’re apart is a really great indicator of how much we care, it’s also a glaring reminder that I don’t get to see my girls everyday. It makes me jealous of those who do have that luxury. Sometimes I’ll just be sitting, doing nothing really, and a wave of missing them comes over me so fiercely I could cry.

7. You never run out of things to talk about.

There’s always something to say when you do see each other again. Usually you’ve already kept up on the gossip so you don’t need to recap that, but you fall right back into the same old conversational patterns you had when you spoke everyday. You’ve probably forgotten just how weird they are (which is why you like them so much, if we’re being honest), and how weird you can be with them (that’s how you bonded in the first place after all).

8. You can be yourself with them.

You don’t have to worry about making them like you. They wouldn’t still be in your life if they didn’t. You know they know the real you, because over nontraditional means of communication (texting, phone calls, Facetime), anything goes. You don’t have to worry that they’ll be grossed out if you pee while they’re on the phone. After all, they used to stand with you in the stall, so…

9. Conversation flutters between old and new memories.

Usually when you see your local friends every day, there’s rarely a reason to talk about memories. You’re typically in the process of making new ones, or planning to make new ones. With long distance best friends, you have more time to explore your past. Old memories are just as important to talk about as planning to make some new ones.

10. You get jealous of their local friends.

You know all of the intimate details of her friends’ and families’ lives as if they were your own. And you're judging the shit out of that one girl who gives her hell and you're secretly jealous of her local BFF, even though you know she's too awesome not to have friends. Besides, you're also grateful that someone's there for her, especially when you can't be.

11.You couldn’t do life without them.

Do I miss being able to see them every day? Absolutely. But I wouldn’t trade having them in my life for anything in the world. We have gone through so many unspeakable things together: the good, the bad, and the truly ugly. They have made me the woman I am today, and for that I am eternally grateful. I couldn’t get through today, or tomorrow, or the next day, without knowing that they are out there in the world doing their thing and kicking ass. I couldn’t do it without knowing that sometime soon they’re going to have some great stories for me.

Bonus: You've seriously contemplated moving your entire life out to her at least once (probably more than once).

Wisco, here I come! Now let your long distance bestie know how much you appreciate her.

Cover Image Credit: Rachel Perna

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