Beauty is uninteresting. There are so many beautiful people in the world, but beauty really doesn’t mean anything. Over time, the look of beauty changes. And with the change of beauty, comes the change in others.
One thing that doesn’t change is confidence.
For instance, when a beautiful woman walks into the room, you glance then go back to whatever you were doing. However, when a confident woman walks into the room, it’s intriguing.
Her confidence is so strong that she captures your attention and the room. The way she carries herself, makes you want to know more about her.
Confidence is strong, captivating, and never fades. And everyone should have it.
It took a while for me to love myself how I do now. I would always pick out every little thing about myself that I hated and wanted to change. I would literally stand in front of the mirror for a couple of minutes pinpointing how I couldn’t wait to get money so that I could change these things.
Now this behavior wasn’t always the case. Growing up, I was always the chunky girl out of my friends and family, but I never saw that as being an issue. I never saw myself less than anything other than gorgeous.
And because of this, they never saw it either. This continued throughout my childhood and through high school. And when I started my glo up, no one could tell me anything.
My face was maturing, I lost a lot of weight, I taught myself how to do basic makeup, and I started to get attention from boys-something I hadn’t experienced before.
So senior year of high school leading into college, my confidence was to the moon. It wasn’t until about the beginning of sophomore year where I found myself to be completely lost. I was in such a funk about myself.
Being in college caused me to really question who I was as a woman. It really takes a mental toll on you if you don’t have the right mindset. And my mental challenged me half of my sophomore year.
I found myself seeing other women on campus and saying to myself, “why can’t I look like that?”. I was so caught up in what I thought was considered to be pretty, that I wasn’t happy with how I looked in my natural state so I would do my makeup every day for class- a full on face.
I never felt like doing my hair so it was thrown up in a bun 24/7, and I had to have a cute outfit on wherever I went.
It led me to gain temporary happiness, but I needed more. No matter what I did, nothing seemed to work.
I even thought about doing a big chop and that it would allow me to feel what I thought was missing, but again, it was only temporary. I actually felt less of what I was before the cut.
One night I was sitting in my room, just thinking. Thinking about what it was about myself that was causing me to continuously feel this way. I would always get complimented on my overall appearance, but I never seemed to believe it.
But as I was sitting there thinking to myself, something clicked. I felt that as many times I was complimented, why wasn’t I believing it myself. So I decided to make some changes.
Instead of sitting in the mirror nitpicking at the things I saw wrong, I started to look at what I liked about myself. I started to smile at myself in the mirror and tell myself things like, “you look good” or “who do you think you are!” or “you’re so pretty”.
Whatever the phrase was that morning, I started to believe it. I embraced myself more and self-cared more.
I realized that if I don’t like something about myself, I had the power to change it. I developed a skincare routine, started eating better, working out, and taking care of my hair.
I stopped caring about how others thought of me as long as I thought of myself to be one of a kind.
By constantly telling myself how gorgeous I was, not beating my face every morning, not caring about what others thought of me, and not caring about other women on campus; eventually, I started to see a change in myself.
Things that I hated a couple months ago, I loved. Every single “flaw” that I thought I had, was overlooked.
I started to notice things about myself that I hadn’t noticed before and loved it. My skin cleared up so well, my curvy shape is one in a million, my hair is the longest and healthiest it’s ever been, and I hold my head up higher.
Today, I look back and see how much confidence and self-esteem I gained within a year or so. And it just keeps getting better.
With confidence came beauty. It wasn’t until I changed my mental state that my physical appearance changed as well.
Seeing and loving my natural beauty really has me feeling the best I’ve felt ever. I actually get grumpy when I have to do my makeup for an event and can’t go with my natural look. So that in itself, says a lot about my growth.
At some point in our lives, we might feel as if we’re not good enough. I felt that way at 19. But that’s okay though. It’s up to you whether or not you choose to continue to feel that way.
Leaving yourself little notes of encouragement or looking at the good in yourself can go a long way. Taking care of yourself, doing things that make you happy, or putting yourself first all contribute to becoming a better you.
Be your own muse. Don’t try to do something just because everyone else is doing it. Do things your way, it’s fun to be different.
Work on you from the inside-out. Once you believe it yourself that you are an amazing individual, the things you see that are wrong, you’ll start to love.
And slowly, but surely your confidence will be so vibrant that others will admire you no matter how you may look.
Capture them with your confidence first, and the rest will follow.