Hey.
I know right now it may seem like you're in the biggest funk of your life and you're not quite certain what to do about it. Your world has been flipped upside down. New school, new life, new people, new places, new drama, new anxiety. It's hard to find your perfect little niche.
Just give it freshman year.
Give it freshman year to find out peoples' true alliances. You're in the group chat, but you're not invited over to hang out with everyone? Not your true blue friends. People tend to be selfish during their freshman year of college and some for many years after. Putting yourself first is not a bad thing, but it's not a good thing to lose empathy.
Give it freshman year to find out peoples' true agendas. Friends don't let other friends feel bad. Friends don't put a significant other before you. Friends are there for you when you need them, they understand your boundaries, and never make you feel bad for being yourself.
Give it freshman year to understand friendship. Your high school or long time best friend who went to school on the opposite end of the country and only calls you when she needs something? Not okay or fair to you, so stop trying to tell yourself otherwise. You see, friendship is a two-way street. Friendship isn't only about going out and getting drunk together, it's about having a shoulder to cry on, someone to laugh to so hard it makes your stomach hurt, and someone you can trust with your life.
Give it freshman year to understand love. That super cute boy who texts you at 11 pm to "come over." Not love. Not worth your time, angel. He is immature and does not deserve to be graced with your presence. That super cute girl who loves to "hang out" only when she's drunk. Not love. Not worth your time. She is immature and does not deserve to be graced with your presence, angel.
Give it freshman year to understand acceptance. I am so sorry and I know it hurts so much, but he/she is just not that into you. I've been there before too many times. Trust me when I say this, good things come with time. Surround yourself with family, love, good karma, and take a breath of fresh air because you've been drowning for too long and it's time to come up.
Give it freshman year to accept moving on. Your best friend stabbed you in the back. It happens, it hurts, but it happens. Instead of living your precious days in a depressing mood and relying on passive aggression towards the aforementioned "friend," understand that you can't dwell on things that happened in the past. It happened for a reason and a damn good one at that. If it's not possible to cut this person out of your life, attempt to find those positive vibes around you and channel them to your spirit.
Give it freshman year to find yourself. It's hard and there are so many bumps in the road, but those bumps reveal who you are. They're helping to create the kick ass person you're becoming and the end game will be beyond your wildest imagination.
This journey will be hard, but it's a journey nonetheless and journeys bring about the best stories.
Just give it freshman year.
