What Girls See When Watching Porn

What Girls See When Watching Porn

They're taught about the internal anatomy in school, but everything else between the legs is left out.
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What are some of the first things girls are taught about sex?

Depending on whether or not young girls are getting a sex education at home, school is the first place many people get introduced to the big complicated world of sex. It is required to learn about the inside anatomy in health class; female students are taught about the ovaries and how babies grow and develop, but everything else between the legs is left out. Sex -- as in the emotional and steamy interaction between two partners -- is still a big mystery. Up until college, many females have very little self-knowledge about what pleasurable and realistic sex looks like. They go on to try and discover their own sexual experiences, most likely expecting some sense of equality and realizations about themselves, only to find they were not adequately given the knowledge to do so.

With so many questions unanswered, many adolescent females are turning to pornography to get the answer about sex they were never given, to learn about their bodies, what feels good and how everything works down there. Researchers who have listened to teenagers talk frankly report that, for many, porn is the main source of sex education. Even those who have not viewed it have heard plenty about it from friends. It is shaping their expectations of sex, which may not be the best thing since porn isn’t really known for its authenticity. One student from Western Washington University opened up about her sex education in high school, “I only remember learning about genitals and puberty, but not about sex explicitly. I was never shown how to put a condom on, told about safe sex, about sexually transmitted diseases, or any of that.”

We find ourselves in a bit of a predicament; a perplexingly ambivalent culture where girls seem to be empowered in almost every sphere expect the sexual one because so little is taught about actually how to have sex. Women are coming of age in a time where pornography is both increasingly aggressive and more widely available than ever, laptops have replaced teachers and parents in the search to find answers about sex.

There is no doubt that pornography sexualizes young women by creating the undue pressure to look and act sexy, particularly during sex. “I definitely think there is a causation between inadequate sex education and young people turning to porn to better understand sex,” says another young woman from Western Washington University. Young girls need to know how to put a name on their sexual desires, how to express their sexuality and be sexual in safe ways, and to know the consequences of not practicing safe sex. “I think porn makes women believe that they need to be really confident and sexy and moan and be loud, when in real life it’s OK to fumble, and it is important to communicate throughout the moment so that each person has an enjoyable experience. Porn makes women believe that it is not OK to ask questions towards their partner and that everything has to run smoothly for it to be sexy for their partner.”

Practicing safe sex means knowing what you want and how to ask for it. Pornography is not just projecting expectations for young men on their partners, these pressures also affect the sexual expectations that girls put on themselves along with what they should expect from sex. The problem is not talking to young girls about how to take charge and assert sexual pleasure for themselves.

It is absolutely important we don't talk about women as the victims here since all young adults are exposed to and affected by the porn industry. We need to be talking clearly and honestly to girls about their own desires and their own pleasures. The kind of sex pornography portrays makes it seem more normal for sexual contact to precede emotional intimacy, so girls are afraid to ask questions even though they must act as if they are having a good time. Sex is important for connection and is only one part of a relationship. It is time for young women to learn to enjoy the pleasure, intimacy and closeness that sex brings without having to worry about how they look.

Cover Image Credit: http://s5.favim.com/orig/53/apple-girl-laptop-pink-Favim.com-500671.jpg

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8 Reasons Why My Dad Is the Most Important Man In My Life

Forever my number one guy.
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Growing up, there's been one consistent man I can always count on, my father. In any aspect of my life, my dad has always been there, showing me unconditional love and respect every day. No matter what, I know that my dad will always be the most important man in my life for many reasons.

1. He has always been there.

Literally. From the day I was born until today, I have never not been able to count on my dad to be there for me, uplift me and be the best dad he can be.

2. He learned to adapt and suffer through girly trends to make me happy.

I'm sure when my dad was younger and pictured his future, he didn't think about the Barbie pretend pageants, dressing up as a princess, perfecting my pigtails and enduring other countless girly events. My dad never turned me down when I wanted to play a game, no matter what and was always willing to help me pick out cute outfits and do my hair before preschool.

3. He sends the cutest texts.

Random text messages since I have gotten my own cell phone have always come my way from my dad. Those randoms "I love you so much" and "I am so proud of you" never fail to make me smile, and I can always count on my dad for an adorable text message when I'm feeling down.

4. He taught me how to be brave.

When I needed to learn how to swim, he threw me in the pool. When I needed to learn how to ride a bike, he went alongside me and made sure I didn't fall too badly. When I needed to learn how to drive, he was there next to me, making sure I didn't crash.

5. He encourages me to best the best I can be.

My dad sees the best in me, no matter how much I fail. He's always there to support me and turn my failures into successes. He can sit on the phone with me for hours, talking future career stuff and listening to me lay out my future plans and goals. He wants the absolute best for me, and no is never an option, he is always willing to do whatever it takes to get me where I need to be.

6. He gets sentimental way too often, but it's cute.

Whether you're sitting down at the kitchen table, reminiscing about your childhood, or that one song comes on that your dad insists you will dance to together on your wedding day, your dad's emotions often come out in the cutest possible way, forever reminding you how loved you are.


7. He supports you, emotionally and financially.

Need to vent about a guy in your life that isn't treating you well? My dad is there. Need some extra cash to help fund spring break? He's there for that, too.

8. He shows me how I should be treated.

Yes, my dad treats me like a princess, and I don't expect every guy I meet to wait on me hand and foot, but I do expect respect, and that's exactly what my dad showed I deserve. From the way he loves, admires, and respects me, he shows me that there are guys out there who will one day come along and treat me like that. My dad always advises me to not put up with less than I deserve and assures me that the right guy will come along one day.

For these reasons and more, my dad will forever be my No. 1 man. I love you!

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Being Sick In College Is A Real Struggle

Being sick in college is definitely not as fun as having a sick day in middle school or high school.

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Something that I have had to deal with multiple times these past two semesters is being sick while in school. It can be a real pain especially depending on what type of sickness it is. I have had tonsillitis, mono, and I'm pretty sure I also had the flu.

Being at school and away from home can make being sick worse because there is nobody to take of you such as your parents. Another thing is having to make the decision to get the rest that your body needs in order to feel better or staying on top of your assignments to avoid falling behind. My parents will always tell me to get a good night's sleep so my body can feel better the next day. However, sometimes I will feel more stress if my work isn't getting done and I feel like I'm falling behind and leaving things to get done in the last minute.

Currently, I am sick now and the past few days haven't been easy, but I still attended all my classes so I wouldn't miss any material or assignments that were given. I usually end up feeling the worst at night when trying to fall asleep, and by that time the doctors are not present at the student health center. Even though my health is important I usually don't like taking too much time out of my day to go to the health center to see a doctor. Some days I don't really have much free time before the evening.

I don't believe I have been over-exerting myself, but I don't want to just stay in my bed all day and sleep, even though that may be what is best for me. Most professors will be understanding if I email them and provide them a doctor's note as well, but I also just got back from a conference where I had to miss two days of classes next week.

I have been trying to keep hydrated so that way my body can fight the sickness. Also, I have been told if you stay hydrated you can flush the virus out of your body quicker.

Eating can also be a pain when you have a sore throat, for the past couple of days I have tried to have some soup in order to help. Most meals I would have to force myself to eat something of substance in order to give my body some type of energy in order to get through the day. It's also never fun not being able to breathe out of your nostrils. If it wasn't my nose being stuffed, then it would be constantly runny so there was no winning that battle.

Looking back, I probably should have done a bit more work over spring break in order to get ahead in the case that something like this would happen. I wanted my break to be exactly that, a break. After not being home for a few months I just wanted some time off to relax.

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