What Girls See When Watching Porn

What Girls See When Watching Porn

They're taught about the internal anatomy in school, but everything else between the legs is left out.
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What are some of the first things girls are taught about sex?

Depending on whether or not young girls are getting a sex education at home, school is the first place many people get introduced to the big complicated world of sex. It is required to learn about the inside anatomy in health class; female students are taught about the ovaries and how babies grow and develop, but everything else between the legs is left out. Sex -- as in the emotional and steamy interaction between two partners -- is still a big mystery. Up until college, many females have very little self-knowledge about what pleasurable and realistic sex looks like. They go on to try and discover their own sexual experiences, most likely expecting some sense of equality and realizations about themselves, only to find they were not adequately given the knowledge to do so.

With so many questions unanswered, many adolescent females are turning to pornography to get the answer about sex they were never given, to learn about their bodies, what feels good and how everything works down there. Researchers who have listened to teenagers talk frankly report that, for many, porn is the main source of sex education. Even those who have not viewed it have heard plenty about it from friends. It is shaping their expectations of sex, which may not be the best thing since porn isn’t really known for its authenticity. One student from Western Washington University opened up about her sex education in high school, “I only remember learning about genitals and puberty, but not about sex explicitly. I was never shown how to put a condom on, told about safe sex, about sexually transmitted diseases, or any of that.”

We find ourselves in a bit of a predicament; a perplexingly ambivalent culture where girls seem to be empowered in almost every sphere expect the sexual one because so little is taught about actually how to have sex. Women are coming of age in a time where pornography is both increasingly aggressive and more widely available than ever, laptops have replaced teachers and parents in the search to find answers about sex.

There is no doubt that pornography sexualizes young women by creating the undue pressure to look and act sexy, particularly during sex. “I definitely think there is a causation between inadequate sex education and young people turning to porn to better understand sex,” says another young woman from Western Washington University. Young girls need to know how to put a name on their sexual desires, how to express their sexuality and be sexual in safe ways, and to know the consequences of not practicing safe sex. “I think porn makes women believe that they need to be really confident and sexy and moan and be loud, when in real life it’s OK to fumble, and it is important to communicate throughout the moment so that each person has an enjoyable experience. Porn makes women believe that it is not OK to ask questions towards their partner and that everything has to run smoothly for it to be sexy for their partner.”

Practicing safe sex means knowing what you want and how to ask for it. Pornography is not just projecting expectations for young men on their partners, these pressures also affect the sexual expectations that girls put on themselves along with what they should expect from sex. The problem is not talking to young girls about how to take charge and assert sexual pleasure for themselves.

It is absolutely important we don't talk about women as the victims here since all young adults are exposed to and affected by the porn industry. We need to be talking clearly and honestly to girls about their own desires and their own pleasures. The kind of sex pornography portrays makes it seem more normal for sexual contact to precede emotional intimacy, so girls are afraid to ask questions even though they must act as if they are having a good time. Sex is important for connection and is only one part of a relationship. It is time for young women to learn to enjoy the pleasure, intimacy and closeness that sex brings without having to worry about how they look.

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65 Truths College Students Need to Hear Right Now

Truth every college student needs to hear.
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1. The best memories are ones you actually can remember.

2. God isn’t going to ask you if you were in a top-tier sorority or fraternity at the gates.

3. You failed a test, not your life.

4. Numbers don’t define you.

5. That includes the number you see that is your grade.

6. Also, how much you weigh.

7. As well as if you are a “7/10” on a so-called “hot scale.”

8. Or if you can bench press 200 lbs. (@ all the guys at the gym, please chill.)

SEE ALSO: 7 Reminders Every College Student Needs To Hear Before The Semester Ends

9. Innocence is nothing to be ashamed of.

10. Neither are mistakes.

11. But learn from your mistakes. Mistakes can be lessons, which can be the biggest blessing.

12. Your metabolism isn’t what it used to be and that is okay.

13. You may not always understand what God is doing, but I promise He has a plan.

14. Every person you meet is battling their own struggles.

15. Life isn’t always great moments.

16. But you have to walk through the forest to get to the mountain top.

17. Your heart isn’t damaged. It is temporarily broken but it will be fixed.

18. However, the only one who can fix a broken heart is the one who created it.

19. So a cute boy or hot girl can’t put the pieces back together.

20. Neither can ice cream.

21. But ice cream can totally help.

22. Stop texting your ex. He/She is your ex for a reason.

23. Loving Jesus means loving people.

24. Loving Jesus also means loving the image of Him in the mirror you see.

25. Stop hiding your emotions. Stop crying in the bathroom or behind a locked door. You have people in your life who care about you.

26. Suicide is never the answer.

27. Breathe in, breathe out.

28. Do you feel your heart pump? Do you feel the air exiting your body? That is a sign you are here for a purpose. Your life is no mistake.

29. Just because you doubt, doesn’t mean you don’t believe in Jesus.

30. However, when walking on the water scares you, look to Jesus and keep your eyes on Him.

31. If you have the opportunity to go to school go. There are young girls around the world who would do anything to sit at the desk you are complaining about.

32. Don’t pick a career based on money.

33. However, I promise you can use any passion or gift to serve a purpose bigger than yourself if you allow yourself to give it to the One who gave it to you.

34. You don’t need pretty prayers to please God.

35. Talk to Him like you are talking to a friend.

36. Look for the good in everyone.

37. That includes the mean girl who no one likes. Chances are she is mean for a reason. Someone was once mean to her. Kill her with kindness.

38. Pray to have the Lord’s eyes. See people with love.

39. Try to have the Lord’s hands, always be reaching out to others.

40. Each morning, pray to have the Lord’s feet and go where He calls you.

41. It is a bad day, not a bad life.

SEE ALSO: What It's Like To Be A College Student In April

42. You don’t need a six-pack to find a man who loves you.

43. You need a spouse who will be able to look at you when you are 80, and wrinkly and maybe a little chunky, and you need him to love you then. If he loves you for your body and your hair, I promise he doesn’t actually love you. Looks fade, but love is eternal. Find someone who loves you like Jesus.

44. Do some squats.

45. But squat so you feel good about yourself, not to attract the opposite sex.

46. You are never too old to find a new hobby.

47. You were beautiful before someone told you.

48. If you don’t know if you are in relationship or not, leave. You deserve clarity, not insecurity.

49. You deserve friendships that are mutual.

50. The best Friday nights are spent with a puppy and food. It is okay to not always be social.

51. Stop worrying about whether your crush will text you back.

52. Stop over analyzing everything in general.

53. Pray for your future spouse.

54. However, also pray for your future bridesmaids/groomsmen. Some of the most influential people you may have in your life you may not have even met yet.

55. Storms bring strength.

56. And storms bring rainbows if you are patient and observant.

57. Stop Pinteresting your dream life and start living it.

58. The Bible is actually extremely relatable. Open it up. Read it.

59. Romans 8:28 “and we know God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.” God is on your team. He wants you to have moments of celebration. He has a purpose for you greater than your bad day.

60. Never forget what Jesus did for you on that cross. When he died for you, it was painful and brutal. It was ugly. It was love. Don’t let that truth ever become numb to you no matter how many times you have heard the story.

61. There is nothing wrong with carbs.

62. Study. And don’t wait for the night before.

63. Find someone who you can look up to.

64. Also, never forget that there is always someone looking up to you. Act like someone you would want your future children to be. Act in a way that reflects wisdom.

65. Smile more, you are loved by the one who hung the stars and painted the sea. He created puppies and carbs–yet still loves you more. That is something to celebrate.

College is tough and life is hard. You are going to have moments where all you want to do is celebrate life with your best friends, but you will also have moments where you just want to lock the door, ignore everyone, and have a good cry. Never forget that your worth comes from something greater than your Biology grade, and from Someone greater that the one who broke your heart.

You aren’t too cool for Christ in college. Christ is a necessity for you in your life. He can hold your hand during your heartbreaks and failures and celebrate with you when you get the text back or a passing grade in foreign language. He loves for you and cares for you more than your sorority or fraternity ever will.

So buy your books, do your homework, but never forget when you are walking to you 8:00 a.m. you regretfully signed up for, to look up. Look at the clouds and the sky and thank your creator that in a big big world with many beautiful things, He still loves our messy hearts even more. So this one is for the boys for the King. This life is for the One who laid down His life.

I promise college is more fun when you dance with your Savior. Follow His lead and let him take you on a journey where you can find your purpose. You may not know where you are going, but you do know who you are following.

So never forget that although classes may be hard, and your metabolism may be slowing down–God is still good. He turns our ashes into beauty and our trials into our testimony. Do life with your creator and I promise you that you will have more than you need.

Romans 8:28 “And we know God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to His purpose.”

Check out my website for more articles on self-worth <3

Twitter: gracev96

Instagram: lemmebeyourvalentine

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'Breaking Up' With Those Toxic Friends Doesn't Make You A Bad Person

When you get stressed interacting with them, then you know something's up.

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I would like to mention that yes, I have done it. It wasn't a toxic relationship but I was uncomfortable and I let them go. I am happier for it and trust me, you will be too.

It's not pretty being in a toxic friendship. It doesn't even have to be toxic. The moment you feel uncomfortable around them, the moment you are stressed to be near them, or you feel scared that they won't listen to your opinions, it's time to let go.

I'm not the kind of person that finds it difficult to let go of people. It is a cycle of life and sometimes, people go and sometimes, they stay. Relationships evolve and people evolve; hoping that things stay the same is a pointless endeavor.

But it is definitely hard to understand that you need to stop talking to someone or else it will make you sadder, more different, move you in a direction that you aren't comfortable with and that changes who you want yourself to be.

It is hard to accept that there is nothing to do now, there is no way to fix it, and you must just stop talking to each other.

You can try your best to explain to them what the issue is, try to resolve it, try to keep that friendship working but sometimes even after that, it simply doesn't work and you do not know where to go from that.

It's ok. It doesn't make you mean or cruel or bad. You are just taking care of yourself and you should. We all should take care of our own mental health before others because we have control over our mental health, not other people's.

Not being friends with someone that you were close to is so weird. You go on with your life and realize that you could fill your time with different things and sometimes, it seems preposterous that there was someone you spent so much of your time with because you don't have those big gaps that you expected to have.

College especially isn't the greatest with friendships. You come in thinking that you are going to find the ones that you will be friends with for the rest of your life and sometimes, you just lose touch and don't talk that much anymore but others that you didn't expect you would become closer to turn out to be the ones that you spend a significant time of your days with.

Friendships are hard and it is harder to even understand if a friendship is blossoming or not but with significant experience, you will realize that your time is precious and spending it with those who you actually care about will make you the happiest.

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