When I met my current boyfriend he was a fuckboy. And I mean the classic dictionary definition of a fuckboy. The "I treat girls like shit and then tell my friends because I think it's funny and something to be proud of" type of fuckboy.
Yeah, I know you know one, too.
The worst part of it is, is that these types of boys have the worst addictive charm to them. For some God-forsaken reason, it is impossible to say no to them. So, I guess in the same way that everyone else does, I fell in love with a fuckboy. From the innocent cheesy pickup line in my DMs, to the horrible first date where I had to pay for parking—I was hooked.
I think that part of me really wanted to relate to the Taylor Swift breakup lyrics that I had grown up with, because I dated the fuckboy. And let me tell you, it's not because I was deceived. I knew damn well he was a fuckboy. I knew his reputation. I knew that I was about to get hurt. But he had a way of sweet talking to girls, many girls, and I wanted it.
To put it gently, the first year of our relationship was bumpy. We encountered many, many talks of "I want flowers randomly, not just on my birthday" and "don't check out other girls in front of me, or at all, really" and "we should go on dates to talk to each other, not watch sports on the restaurant's TV" and even "you really shouldn't touch my butt while in public."
It seemed just like training a dog. No matter how many times we had to have the talk of how to be a good boyfriend and how to be respectful towards women, he would still find a way to stay in tune with his old fuckboy ways.
Some fuckboys truly are not curable. I'm lucky though, because mine was.
I cannot tell you that it takes "X" amount of months and he will no longer be a fuckboy. It's been over two years and there are still days I have to remind him that he's acting like the "old version" of himself. I think that sometimes being a fuckboy runs in their blood. They can't help it.
But I now come home to flowers sitting on my porch, I get all of the attention in the world on dates, I'm flaunted on his social media, and I never have to worry about him hitting up another girl.
He hates his fuckboy past. He wishes he could change it, as I'm sure most boys do as they grow out of their immature "girls are the only thing that matter" phase that literally every boy goes through in high school and/or college.
I'm not saying that every fuckboy will change or that you should take it upon yourself as a project to change one. I got lucky. A year of "training" brought me the experience of dating 3 types of boys all in 1—a fuckboy, boyfriend material, and hopefully someday, husband material.
