To the girl who has no luck in love,
Let me preface this by saying that I am you. I have looked for love in the wrong places. I have tried to find validation through a guy. I have been left on read. I have been ignored, dumped, cheated on, lied to, and the list goes on and on. I have been through it all. Maybe you have too- which is why you need these reminders just as much as I do.
I want to remind you that you don't need a man to feel validated.
Casual sex is common in college, I get it. That being said, don't look for love in meaningless one night stands- you won't find it. Trust me.
I want to remind you that it is okay to be single.
Cherish the free time you have to better yourself and figure out what you really want. Who decided that there is something wrong with being single?
I want to remind you that you should never stoop below your standards.
However, remember that looks are not everything.
I want to remind you that good things happen to those who wait.
I know it's cliche, but Rome wasn't built in a day. Love the life you live right now, and try not to dwell on what you cannot change.
I want to remind you that you don't want the kind of man that doesn't put in the effort to make you feel special.
The guy who "forgets" to text you back, ignores you in public, or sends a 2 am "wyd?" text is not worth your time. Trust me.
I want to remind you that you deserve the best.
Is he the type of guy that your mother will like? If the answer is no- you deserve better.
I want to remind you that rejection happens to everyone.
There are people who find Emma Watson unattractive- but does that mean she's not attractive?
I want to remind you that even if you miss your ex, he doesn't deserve that 1 a.m. text.
He is out of your life for a reason- you don't need his affection.
I want to remind you that no man is worth compromising your values or aspirations for.
Don't let a guy push you to do anything that you don't feel comfortable with, or hinder you from doing anything that you desire.
I want to remind you to focus on what you have.
Your loyal friends, your loving family. Love what you have right now.
I want to remind you that it is okay to go after what you want.
Don't be afraid to sit next to him, send that first text, or start the conversation. He might be just as nervous.
I want to remind you that guys who are trouble, cause trouble.
I know all too well how appealing the "bad boy" is. But in the wise words of Taylor Swift, "I knew you were trouble when you walked in, so shame on me now."
I want to remind you that all the relationship advice in the world won't make a difference if you're choosing the wrong guy.
We don't make mistakes, we date them. Right ladies?
We're told from a young age that love should be this cataclysmic all-consuming force that sweeps us off our feet. We think that we should fall head over heels for a guy. You get butterflies in your stomach, heart palpitations when you see a text from him. You can't get him out of your head, you overanalyze everything. You never know where you stand with him and It's an emotional rollercoaster, but let's face it –– you can't get enough.
We're taught that this is the only way to experience falling in love. But imagine a different scenario where you're just comfortable with each other. You casually hang out, you let hours go between your texts without worry, and best of all, there's no drama.
We're taught to choose the first scenario- the one that leaves us breathless. But I challenge you to look for love in the lukewarm dates. Look for love in the comfortable phone calls.
