I am a full time college student who lives 2 1/2 hours away from home. So when I go to college, I generally don't have a lot of time to visit home--maybe once or twice a semester if I am lucky. So when I move back to college after break, I move in full force. Of course, when I came home for a month, I seriously packed up my entire car. I brought home 100 outfits but only stuck to tee shirts and sweats. Although i worked a lot over break (as I am sure many of you did), it was still a relaxing time. There were no deadlines, no meetings, and no group projects. My mom cooked my meals and I slept in my nice cozy queen-sized bed. Living at home is a completely different experience for everyone--some can't stand going home and stay at college over break. Some dread going back to school and just want to live at home forever. I'd like to think I am somewhere in the middle.

I am so grateful I have a good family to come home to, and I enjoy coming home so much. At the same time, I am going to school so I can not live in my parent's basement my entire life. I also really do love being at school, and even though I enjoyed my time relaxing, being busy is good for me. Relaxing is even better after you have actually worked to earn that time. I can honestly say, though, coming back this semester I did not prepare myself mentally for what is to come.

I didn't know where I could park for my parking pass, I didn't know how I was getting to class on the first day, and I didn't even look at one email my professor sent me over break. The first two weeks coming back usually are a time where I have to get into school mode, which is a completely different mindset than what I have at home. I have to be active and make time for lots of different things. I have to be organized and ready to pass all of my classes (let's hope).

I find that when I switch environments I tend to get more anxious and stressed. Whether I am heading home or going back to school. Either way, I am leaving my now comfortable situation and going to live a completely different way. Being in college means being in a constant state of change. Each year I will have lived in a different place, made new friends and will be having friends graduate or study abroad. I like to get comfortable. College is a hard place to do that because things change so often. Although I am comfortable in my school, the places I am going and the things I am involved in are in a constant state of change. I am always pushing myself out of my comfort zone, because it is what you are supposed to do in order to grow.

The reason I came to college is to expand my education to get a better job, while growing as a person in the process. If I were to stay in my apartment all day long and just attend my classes and do my assignments and then go to bed, I could do that from home. There is no need for me to go 2 1/2 hours away for that. I like being content and comfortable, but that's not why I am here. I am here to not stay the same person I was freshman year. I want to be a transformed version of myself by the time I graduate.

Maybe no one else feels this way and maybe more people than I thought feel this way. I know when I get upset at not being home or not being at school, I try to remember to enjoy my time in each place and really take in what you have. I don't have much more time in my life where I will actually be living in my childhood home. I should embrace and enjoy that. I also don't have much more time in college and I need to embrace and enjoy that as well.

People always say "you want what you can't have" or "the grass always seems greener on the other side," but in reality you aren't appreciating what you have now. I am of fault to this many, many times, but I try to see what I have now and take it in.

The days seem long, but the years feel short.

I cannot believe I am almost halfway through college. I have so much more to learn and I hope to walk through the next years with an open mind to take in as much as I possibly can.