How To Get Right Swipes On Your Tinder Profile, Or Left, If You're Not Careful

How To Get Right Swipes On Your Tinder Profile, Or Left, If You're Not Careful

*Spoiler* Don't post a photo of you with a dead fish.


There are a variety of ways to get right swipes on your Tinder profile that have nothing to do with your appearance. If your Tinder game has been a little off lately, read on to find out how to improve.

Left: "If I see a guy holding a fish or some dead animal I cry. Also, if they are on a tractor I cry."

Boys holding a dead fish are arguably the equivalent of a horse girl — don't @ me.

Right: "A wholesome photo of a guy with his family."

ESPECIALLY when it's a photo of a guy with a baby. That will literally melt a girl's heart.

Left: "When you can't tell who the guy is because all of their photos are in groups."

I mean come on...You're telling me you don't have a SINGLE photo of you alone? Not even a selfie? But the same goes for girls as well. Guys said this is an automatic left swipe for them too.

"No Linda, I'm not going to play fucking guess who."

Right: "Boys with photos of them and their dog."

There have been times I have almost swiped left on a guy and I kept going through their photos and I saw a picture of their adorable dog. I HAD to swipe right.

Left: "Bios that say 'here for a good time not a long time."

Chad, we can all tell based on your "here for a good time not a long time" bio that you aren't going to take anything seriously.

Right: "A good pun or joke in their bio."

If you can get a laugh out of someone just based on your bio — you're doing well for yourself. Both guys and girls appreciate this.

Left: "Political statements like MAGA flags, anything sexist or overly offensive."

Automatic LEFT.

Right: "If they have good taste in music."

This is something I always look at if I'm unsure if I should swipe right. You can learn a lot about someone based on their Spotify playlist.

Left: "Guys who only have mirror pics of them at the gym."

Right: "When they're over 6 foot."

Sorry boys. Height matters.

Left: "A photo with a guy that looks like could be her ex."

I mean, who wants to see what they're up against?

Right: "Sometimes I ironically swipe right on guys who have the girl's face blurred out and have "this could be you" written underneath."

I know some girls would swipe left on this, but for some of us we think it's hilarious. Definitely hit or miss. Gotta find a girl with the right sense of humor.

Left: "If they have photos with their cat. I hate cat girls."

Okay, this one is entirely preference based as the dog photo, but I think you really attract specific types of people based on if your photos include a dog or cat. So keep that in mind.

Right: "A bio that doesn't scream imma hoe."

I'm not really sure what this means but this is one of the answers I got...

Left: "If their profile is generic and super boring."

Cliché quotes are a definite no-go.

Right: "Similar interests in bio."

Left: "If they're a blues fan."

Posting which teams you're a fan of can either serve you really well or get you a left swipe. Choose carefully.

Right: "If they're wearing a suit in one of their photos."

Are they wearing it because they're a successful businessperson? Or because they went to a wedding? Who knows. Either way — very attractive.

Unmatch: "If their pickup line is just too dirty."

Sometimes pickup lines that are dirty can be clever and funny but other times they're just too much and can be really gross.

You don't even want to know some of the atrocious pickup lines that I've gotten and unmatched because of it. There's a fine line between dirty and "do you talk to your momma with that mouth?"

Right: "If they have a photo of them doing something adventurous."

Post those sky diving pics even if you look obnoxious. Might get you a few more right swipes.

I hope after reading these you have a better idea of how to market yourself on dating apps. Good luck and happy swiping!

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7 Reasons Why Tinder Is A Bad Idea

When you're sick of being single so you decide to go swipe right for matches. Trust me, its a bad idea.

"Are you looking for something serious or just a hookup?"

Face it, Tinder is one of those apps that you download when you reach a low point in your dating life or an app you use to hook up with local hotties. For those of you who aren't aware what Tinder is, it's a "dating app" that is location based. It finds people that fit into whatever criteria you're looking for such as age, sex, and location. You select an age group, which sex you're interested in, and how far in mileage you want them to be from you. Boom! You're all set for the worst dating app in the world and here's why.

1. People are not always who they say they are.

Okay, this guy was really sketchy so I told him I thought he was a catfish, he never responded.. Be sure to investigate every person. Not everyone is who they say they are. Getting catfished is a real thing and people do it on Tinder all of the time. Don't be tricked into thinking you're talking to this really hot guy, because in reality, he probably is this weird old guy that looks like a non-cartoon version of Homer Simpson. Be cautious of all red flags!

2. When getting swipe happy backfires.

When you get a bunch of people in a row that you're not interested in, you keep swiping left really fast and then sometimes accidentally swipe left on a really hot guy. Gone. He's gone! I will never be able to get him back and I'm not paying $2.99 so I can go back and swipe right. So, until we meet again hot guy!

3. Messages that get sent to you that make you feel super uncomfortable.

This is what happens when you make a Tinder.. everyone thinks you're just down to hook up.. WRONG. Sorry dude, you're really attractive and all, but I just met you less than 24 hours ago. No, I will not "slide on you." Ugh, this is what I get for making a Tinder.

4. That awkward moment when you see someone from Tinder in real life, not on purpose.

Sometimes you forget that these people are real and they are in the same area as you. It's just the worst when your having a bad hair day and have a giant pimple and you see someone from Tinder. Its like ahhhhh don't look at me. Or really, you're just ashamed to even have a Tinder and be seen in public.

5. Be careful, your charming personality might get your Tinder matches attached.

This guy, I honestly thought was going to work out. He was actually a normal, cool dude. We talked on Facetime and everything. But then he started to take things too fast and too soon and I got scared. He was trying to be my sugar daddy. He was offering to buy me anything I wanted and how he would drive 200 miles just to see me. So I started to ignore him for days and then we finally stopped talking! Then he took a screenshot of picture of me off of my Snapchat story. I was not happy about it and we haven't talked since! I don't even want to know what he did with the picture.

6. Meeting someone from Tinder for a "date".

So lets say, Tinder actually worked and you find someone you think might be cool and its time to finally meet in person. Its awkward! You don't know if you should hand shake, or hug or even introduce yourself. I've personally been on 3 Tinder dates (don't judge me because they all go to my university and I've seen them in real life prior to the occasion) and only 1/3 has gone well enough to where I still speak to the person.

7. It is sadly addicting.

Why do I always find myself on this app swiping whenever I have the chance? Engaging in conversations with people just because I'm bored and have nothing better to do. Someone take my phone away from me, please.

Tinder is my guilty pleasure. I'm sorry mom.

Cover Image Credit: Haley Rascoe

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If You Catfish Your Boyfriend To 'Test' If He'll Cheat, The Problem In Your Relationship Is YOU

News Flash: this is why (when you aren't together anymore) he says you are crazy.


Being in a relationship is not an easy feat. There are many things that are important to have a successful relationship. Trust, honesty, and loyalty are just a few to mention.

A few days ago I was scrolling through Facebook (does this show my age? oof) and came across a video: "CATFISHING my Boyfriend to see if he cheats.. (you won't believe this)" obviously I clicked on it because I was curious. The girl in the video talks about this 'prank' she's going to play on her boyfriend.

First wrong: This is not a prank.

She explains how she has made a fake Instagram account; She made posts using another girl's pictures, followed a bunch of people and then followed her boyfriend.

Second wrong: Using someone else's identity.

She then messaged her boyfriend using this fake Instagram account trying to persuade him into Netflix and chilling. When he replied saying she was cute she started to cry... It went on and on but basically, he ended up proving to her that he would not do that to her.

I'm sorry, WHAT?

OK, let's be real for a second. If you have any need to do this, THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG. Trust, honesty, and loyalty are some of the most important things in a relationship... having the need to do this literally just shows that those three things do not exist. But for the sake of it, say you do it.

Only two things can happen...

Scenario one: He cheats (plans to cheat).

If this happens, it probably just proves something that you knew deep down and just didn't want to admit it. So you break up with him. Well, the other girl still exists, but he's going to find out it is you because she does not actually exist. So then you are the one to blame in his eyes because he "would have never done it", he "just thought it was you" and was "testing you". Either way, your relationship is over and has more issues than you already thought.

Scenario two: He does not cheat.

Congrats!!! He's not a cheater. BUT you have issues. You obviously have no trust and do not respect him enough to ask. You also are not being honest in the least bit because are you going to tell him? He will think you are crazy if you tell him. In addition to those issues, you have no sense of loyalty and must have had a reason to test his loyalty... you got a hill to climb.

Either way, you do not look that great and just make the "DUDE, SHE'S CRAZY" actually true. But you know, to each their own.

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