Dear Old Friends,

There is so much I want to say, so much I want to apologize for, so many things I want to tell you. Unfortunately, I am not given that chance anymore. We were close, in fact closer than close. I always considered you as my family and you considered me a part of yours. That's why it still hurts knowing that we do not talk anymore.

I miss your company. When we were together we would laugh until we cried and came up with the weirdest inside jokes. I miss when I never wanted to stop hanging out with you because you made me a happier person. Whenever we would always do something stupid, we made sure we would never forget it. Having you in my life seriously brought me so much joy and so much pain. I want to highlight all the times where you made me the happiest person alive, but when I think of that I can't help but think about how crushed I was when we drifted apart.

I am not blaming you for everything that went wrong, because I certainly had fault in it as well. At times I really want to hate you for what happened to us. Hating you for not keeping up with your end of our friendship or not trying to stay in touch with me. I can't hate you though, because I did the same thing. It is a lot tougher for me to write this letter to you than it appears to be. Trying to find the right words to explain how I feel in this situation is a challenge. I don't want to offend you in any way because that's the last thing I want to do. I just want you to know that life hasn't been so easy without you by my side.

I wanted you there when I started college. I wanted you there when I moved to a different state, I wanted you there so I could complain about the arguments with my boyfriend, but you weren't. I wanted you there when I started my new job — to tell you how amazing it was. I wanted you there when I would fight with my mom. I wanted you there when I was sad and just felt like watching Disney movies, but you weren't.

It sucks that I can't experience life with you anymore. We had so many plans together — the amount of road trips we wanted to go on was ridiculous. You were supposed to be my maid of honor in my wedding, but things change. People make mistakes and grow apart and that certainly has been the case with us. We lost touch. The plans we had with each other are now going to be fulfilled by other people who have come into my life, but there will always be a place in my heart for you. My new friends mean so much to me and I am so glad I met them, but the only reason I am so close to them now is because we weren't close anymore.

I want to thank you for the amount of time you spent being my friend. I hope you can look back on your life and think to yourself "She was a pretty great friend," because that is all I wanted to be for you. Our time together has shaped me into the individual I am today, and I couldn't be more proud of myself. Thank you for teaching me important life lessons. If it wasn't for you I wouldn't have learned half of the things that I know now. Thank you for being my partner in crime and my shoulder to cry on. Even though our time was short lived, it certainly wasn't taken for granted.

I left the most important part of this for last: I hope you are living the life you have always wanted to live. You better be chasing those dreams you would always talk about, with no one holding you back. Take advantage of every opportunity thrown at you because i'm still cheering you on from the sidelines. Even if you don't hear form me or even see me anymore, just know that I always wish you the best in life. There's nothing I want more in life than to see you succeed, even though I am not there to hold your hand through it. I miss you a lot. We aren't friends anymore, but I still care about you, and I can only hope the feelings are mutual. So old friends, I end with this,

"There are far, far better things ahead than any we leave behind." - C.S. Lewis

Yours Truly,

An Old Friend