When people see me wearing Greek letters, they ask what sorority I’m in. It's a logical question but the answer is none. I’m a girl in a fraternity. Yes, I’m sure. Yes, fraternities can be co-ed. Yes, I’m called a brother. When I pledged Mu Beta Psi I didn’t think about how this is out of social norms and how I would have to explain to family and friends. Here are the questions I find myself being asked the most as a girl in a Fraternity.
Q: Girls can be in fraternities?
A: Yes. Mu Beta Psi was founded in 1925, it wasn’t until 1962 that they voted to allow women in. We’re not the only ones. With today’s push for gender equality, many older organizations are opening to become coed.
Q: Are you sure you’re in a fraternity?
A: Yes. I'm in a fraternity for men and women. I knew this beforehand. I just never thought about how many times I would have to explain that fraternities can be coed. Also, because we aren’t a social or professional fraternity, we aren’t on the Greek Council. We’re not officially recognized as Greeks. But Mu Beta Psi is different than an honor society. An honor society focuses on a major/area of study. We accept music lovers of all majors, and being in an ensemble isn’t required either. Coed fraternities usually focus on community service first, then brotherhood bonding. In our case, we focus on musical service and promoting music in the community before we do other service.
Q: Why isn't your Fraternity on Greek Council like regular Greeks?
A: We’re not a part of Greek council. Mu Beta Psi is a National Honorary Musical Fraternity. This means that we’re more of an honor society focused on music and service. To join an honor society, you typically either receive an invitation or submit an application. Additional requirements may include certain classes or a certain GPA. While Mu Beta Psi does require an application and a minimum GPA, we also have a pledging process. Because we have this typical pledging process, we consider ourselves an honorary fraternity. We have the best of both worlds!
Q: So, why didn’t you join an honor society then?
A: We do have brothers that are also in honor societies. I wasn’t looking to join Mu Beta Psi — it found me. More importantly, I came into NMU as a music education major, and after lots of switching I’ll be leaving as a public relations major. I joined Mu Beta Psi my first semester on campus, but I didn’t figure out my major until the summer before my junior year. Joining an honor society would have been a poor choice for me because of my academically switched gears many times. If I had come in knowing exactly what I wanted to do and knowing I would stick to it, then an honor society would have been a great thing for me!
Q: Did you join to meet guys?
A: Not at all. This may be the case for a few girls in coed fraternities, but not me. I joined Mu Beta Psi because I believed in their purposes and I wanted to help improve music and service on campus and in the community. Plus, girls in sororities can meet guys through their corresponding fraternity.
Q: Why didn’t you join a sorority?
I wasn’t planning on joining a sorority, or Mu Beta Psi for that matter. Most of the first friends I made at NMU were brothers and one told me I should check out a rush event. I was very hesitant to join the Greek life, but I fell in love with the organization. I wasn’t looking to join a sorority. Mu Beta Psi found me and made its way into my heart.
Q: Since there are guys and girls, do you date each other?
A: It happens. When you’re spending that much time with someone and forming a bond through your love of music and service, people are going to end up dating. There are many alumni couples — some married, some with kids and grandkids — all over the country that met in Mu Beta Psi. I am actually dating one of my pledge brothers, but that wasn’t my goal. Creating such strong bonds between guys and girls will inevitably end up with a few couples forming. I mean, we are a group of people with similar interests and values, which is always nice to have in a partner. Most brothers aren’t dating other brothers, so there isn't a majority of couples. But of course there are a few.
I love Mu Beta Psi with all my heart, but I never would have guessed that it would lead to so many repetitive questions! But I don't mind the inquiries about something I'm super passionate about like that. Being a girl in a fraternity is just a part of who I am. I never thought about how uncommon it is. So I thought I would answer some questions that girls in fraternities everywhere get.
