To my former classmate,
A lot has happened since you've been gone. There's a seat in the classroom that waits for someone to fill its emptiness, but we all know that's where you used to sit. The class has become much closer ever since we heard the news. We had no idea what you were going through and probably never will.
We showed up to that first class after we had heard about you. We wondered why and what we could've done to help you. To us, you were a part of a routine. We learned that we are all blind to the people around us. We go from class to class so that we can get good grades and hopefully have a better future for ourselves and our family.
We learned to open our eyes. Our hearts go out to your friends and family who yearn for you to come back.
I often wonder what you were thinking about. What led you to a place so dark that there was only one option left in your mind? What could we have done? I know I was never close super close to you. A few conversations here and there, but nothing deeper than discussing the reading assignment or talking about our past weekend.
The truth is, people are good at hiding their pain, often too good. They hide themselves and their feelings from the outside world. We all have struggles, and we all have faced pain, but none of us could've imagined what was about to come.
Our class is more than just a class now, it's a family. We know each other more than we ever have, and continue to support each other during difficult times. Our professor can't help but feel responsible for what happened.
As an educator, he cared for you and wanted help, and he will never forget you and the lessons you have taught him. I don't know why you did it, but I want you to know that your grades are not a reflection of who you are.
One letter does not determine your future or your self-worth. I want everyone to know that. GRADES DO NOT REPRESENT WHO YOU ARE! I can't stress that enough.
You have impacted every single one of us in some way. It's different without you here, but we will make it through the semester together. I wish I could've helped, we all do, but none of us knew. I know now to pay more attention to those around me and to be more present in others' lives because you never know what they are going through.
We miss you.
IF YOU OR SOMEONE YOU KNOW ARE STRUGGLING WITH SUICIDAL THOUGHTS AND/OR TENDENCIES, REACH OUT IMMEDIATELY. NO ONE SHOULD GO THROUGH THIS ALONE. SUICIDE IS SERIOUS.
National Suicide Hotline: 1 (800) 273-8255 - available 24/7
